Playing football and presenting TV are totally different things, but there are similarities: it's exciting, it can go well, it can go badly... the difference is when presenting goes badly, it doesn't really affect anyone's life, whereas when you have a bad day on the pitch, it affects people's moods for a whole week.

Gary Lineker

Categorized in : You Day Life Football

Soccer is a game for 22 people that run around, play the ball, and one referee who makes a slew of mistakes, and in the end Germany always wins.

Gary Lineker

running soccer funny

Football is a simple game. Twenty-two men chase a ball for 90 minutes and at the end, the Germans always win.

Gary Lineker

soccer sports funny

Every act of kindness is potent and lingers long in the heart of the recipient.

Gary Lineker

kindness heart long

The big thing is, everybody says it's being in the right place at the right time. But it's more than that, it's being in the right place all the time. Because if I make 20 runs to the near post and each time I lose my defender, and 19 times the ball goes over my head or behind me - then one time I'm three yards out, the ball comes to the right place and I tap it in - then people say, right place, right time. And I was there all the time.

Gary Lineker

yards running people

If someone in the crowd spits at you, you have just got to swallow it.

Gary Lineker

spit crowds football

I am not leaving twitter. If the mindless few defeat the thoughtful majority we are all doomed.

Gary Lineker

thoughtful majority leaving

To be honest, it would have been better to watch it on Ceefax.

Gary Lineker

media football soccer

The best, most successful managers in the modern era are those who can keep a player happy even if he is not in the team. Given the size of the squads and the use of rotation nowadays, that's tougher than it's ever been.

Gary Lineker

team player successful

I just think to be a manager you've got to live and breathe and have this incredible enthusiasm for football, the whole thing. And while I love the game, and it's been a large part of my life, it's not the only thing in my life.

Gary Lineker

games football thinking

You've got no chance of reaching the top if you're just playing for money.

Gary Lineker

reaching-the-top reaching chance

That's one of the magical things about the Olympics, Team GB will have someone challenging in a sport that we've never watched and all of a sudden it'll be the biggest thing ever.

Gary Lineker

team challenges sports

Ooh, it's too embarrassing to share my innermost romantic secrets - although I have written Danielle the odd poem. If anything they are more comedic than romantic. They used to be well received but that was before she started studying Shakespeare at drama college. Now I feel so inept.

Gary Lineker

college romantic drama

Chris Hughton has been sacked by Norwich. Now? With 5 games to go? Utterly bonkers!

Gary Lineker

league games football

Fella’s a genius. Best ever by a distance in my life time. Never really saw Pele… Souness, Gullit, Venables and now Rooney agree Messi is the best they have seen. He plays a game with which we are not familiar.

Gary Lineker

distance games play

He's got great credentials by winning the World Cup, but he did it with Brazil - my granny could probably have managed Brazil to World Cup success.

Gary Lineker

winning football soccer

Footballers are more likely to work better if they get a pat on their back from the boss. A knife in the back is never the answer.

Gary Lineker

boss knives answers

The World Cup is every four years, so it's going to be a perennial problem.

Gary Lineker

four world years

A handball is when your hand touches the ball.

Gary Lineker

handball balls hands

When I see old photos of me on the beach I don't look too bad... but it's hard trying to breathe in for such a long time when I spot the photographers!

Gary Lineker

photo-of-me beach long

There's no in between-you're either good or bad. We were in between.

Gary Lineker

football soccer funny