The Dilbert Principle The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage--Management. Scott Adams More Quotes by Scott Adams More Quotes From Scott Adams Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting. Scott Adams clothesfashionbusiness Aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment. Scott Adams humorousbusinessdisappointment Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean. Scott Adams realacceptancemean The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day Scott Adams delusionhumanshelping Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally Scott Adams officemindthinking Obviously there's not much options when you're a cartoonist - you pretty much either work at home or rent an office I guess, and working at home just seems easier. Scott Adams easierofficehome One of the reasons why you like to do your own drawings is, your style changes over time. And there's something about that that keeps it fresh to the viewer. Scott Adams styledrawingreason-why There are always deadlines I have to meet. I don't let myself get too close to the deadlines, so it's not like I'm just sweating bullets or anything if the clock is ticking. I never let myself get in that situation. Scott Adams clock-tickingclock-is-tickingbullets The Cheesecake Factory is a great business model, but if you take your wife there for your 25th wedding anniversary, you might not reach your 26th. Scott Adams wedding-anniversarywifefood Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there Scott Adams mailmenworld I should have written that down. - Dilbert Scott Adams dilbertshouldshould-have What does it mean to be yourself?” he asked. “If it means to do what you think you ought to do, then you’re doing that already. If it means to act like you’re exempt from society’s influence, that’s the worst advice in the world; you would probably stop bathing and wearing clothes. The advice to ‘be yourself’ is obviously nonsense. But our brains accept this tripe as wisdom because it is more comfortable to believe we have a strategy for life than to believe we have no idea how to behave. Scott Adams being-yourselfmeanbelieve I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero. Scott Adams zeromindlong When did ignorance become a point of view? Scott Adams ignoranceviewsdoubt Your shower is ready - I turned it on last night. Scott Adams dilbertlastsnight The job isn't done until you've blamed someone for the parts that went wrong. Scott Adams donejobs There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color. Scott Adams colorlooksideas The main difference between marketing and fraud is that criminals have to pay for their own alcohol. Scott Adams marketingdifferencesalcohol When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater. Scott Adams chokestupidgiving If you spend all your time arguing with people who are nuts, you'll be exhausted and the nuts will still be nuts. Scott Adams nutsarguingpeople
