The Lord's our shepherd, says the psalm. But just in case, we better get a bomb. Tom Lehrer More Quotes by Tom Lehrer More Quotes From Tom Lehrer I recall this sergeant's informing me and my "room-mates" of this rather deplorable fact the army didn't have any official, excuse me, didn't have no official song and suggested that we work on this in our copious free time. Tom Lehrer armysongrooms Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer. Tom Lehrer stupidanswerssilly In one word he told me the secret of success in mathematics: plagiarize; only be sure always to call it . . . research. Tom Lehrer researchsecretsuccess But in the new (math) approach, the important thing is to understand what you're doing, rather than to get the right answer. Tom Lehrer educationmathknowledge I wasn't really a performer by temperament. Tom Lehrer temperamentperformers In my youth there were words you couldn't say in front of a girl; now you can't say 'girl.' Tom Lehrer frontsyouthgirl All books can be indecent books, though recent books are bolder. Tom Lehrer menbookdirty I'm not tempted to write a song about George W.Bush. I couldn't figure out what sort of song I would write. That's the problem: I don't want to satirise George Bush and his puppeteers, I want to vaporise them. And that's not funny. Tom Lehrer wantwritingsong When you attend a funeral, It is sad to think that sooner o' Later those you love will do the same for you. And you may have thought it tragic, Not to mention other adjec- Tives, to think of all the weeping they will do. (But don't you worry. Tom Lehrer funeralworrythinking Once all the Germans were warlike and mean But that couldn't happen again We taught them a lesson in nineteen eighteen And they've hardly bothered us since then Tom Lehrer nineteenprayermean If the hoods don't get you, the monoxide will. Tom Lehrer hoodifs Don't write naughty words on the wall if you can't spell! Tom Lehrer naughtywallwriting I would do nightclubs and concerts - particularly concerts, which is mostly what I did - and only people who already agreed with me would show up. People weren't going to come and inadvertently turn on their television set and find this offensive stuff coming out. Tom Lehrer stuffpeopletelevision I'm not an original composer. The tunes are not stolen from other tunes necessarily except in a few cases, but they're in the style of songs that I grew up with. Tom Lehrer styletunessong Well I wasn't really attacking the religious beliefs [in the song 'The Vatican Rag'], I was attacking the formality of the rituals of the Catholic church; however, people took it wrongly. Tom Lehrer catholicreligiouspeople The people who came to hear me perform or to buy my records were not the type who would be offended [by the song 'The Vatican Rag']. But I gather that there were other people who were offended. Tom Lehrer recordswould-bepeople I'm very proud of myself on my, whatever the literacy is, I'm pretentious, totally pretentious. I like to say 'hmm', for example. Tom Lehrer literacyproudexample People would go anywhere to see a famous person in the flesh, no matter what they do. Tom Lehrer fleshmatterpeople Everything is so weird in politics that it's very hard to be funny about it, I think. Tom Lehrer hardthinking I figure I wrote 37 songs in 20 years, and that's not exactly a full-time job. It wasn't that I was writing and writing and writing and quit. Tom Lehrer writingsongjobs
