The plot is so tired that even this reviewer, who in infancy was let drop by a nurse with the result that she has ever since been mystified by amateur coin tricks, was able to guess the identity of the murderer from the middle of the book. Dorothy Parker More Quotes by Dorothy Parker More Quotes From Dorothy Parker You do what you can, and you do it because you should. But all you can do is all you can do. Dorothy Parker deeds should can-do But I don't give up; I forget why not. Dorothy Parker why-not dont-give-up giving-up I'm never going to accomplish anything; that's perfectly clear to me. I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that any more. Dorothy Parker nails names fame I won't telephone him. I'll never telephone him again as long as I live. He'll rot in hell, before I'll call him up. You don't have to give me strength, God; I have it myself. If he wanted me, he could get me. He knows where I am. He knows I'm waiting here. He's so sure of me, so sure. I wonder why they hate you, as soon as they are sure of you. Dorothy Parker hate relationship giving Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat. Dorothy Parker kick-ass writing art I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid. Dorothy Parker wedding marriage stupid The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk. Dorothy Parker hangover drunk alcohol Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne. Dorothy Parker envy wine drinking Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away. Dorothy Parker inspirational love life [On being shown an apartment by a real estate agent:] Oh, dear, that's much too big. All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends. Dorothy Parker few-friends agents real Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation. Dorothy Parker irritation pity women That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them. Dorothy Parker hilarious inspirational funny It turns out that, at social gatherings, as a source of entertainment, conviviality, and good fun, I rank somewhere between a sprig of parsley and a single ice-skate. Dorothy Parker ice gathering fun You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think. Dorothy Parker women funny thinking I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours. Dorothy Parker running book hands I don't want to be classed as a humorist. It makes me feel guilty. I've never read a good tough quotable female humorist, and I never was one myself. I couldn't do it. A "smartcracker" they called me, and that makes me sick and unhappy. There's a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words. Dorothy Parker distance sick unhappy I'd like to have money. And I'd like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that's too adorable, I'd rather have money. Dorothy Parker adorable together two The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man. Dorothy Parker women earth men Writing well is the best revenge. Dorothy Parker wells revenge writing It was written without fear and without research. Dorothy Parker entertainment research art