When I hear people talk about juggling or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy because sacrifice infers that there was something better to do than the thing - than being with your children. Chris Rock More Quotes by Chris Rock More Quotes From Chris Rock I want to really take chances. I want to be funny in a lot of different ways. I'd like to be great. I want to reach for greatness. Chris Rock greatness different want Stand-up comedy is like the lowest medium in all of show business in levels of respect. Chris Rock mediums comedy levels I think anybody in front of a crowd is a comedian. Chris Rock crowds comedian thinking When a musical act performs, the black audience goes crazy for all the stuff, the album cuts, everything. White audiences, they're nice and all, but they're not going to lose it until they get the hits. Comedy is the same thing. Chris Rock cutting crazy nice Men lie the most. Men lie all the time. Chris Rock lying-men men lying Oprah is so rich, I saw John Kerry proposing to her. Chris Rock rich saws politics There's bad and then there's EDDY CURRY BAD. Chris Rock curry Whoever you hate will end up in your family. You don't like gays? Chris Rock daughter hate funny When you meet somebody for the first time, you're not meeting them. You're meeting their representative. Chris Rock meetings first-time firsts My mother always says: "You know better, so you'll be punished. Your friends don't know better, so they won't be punished. They can go snatch chains and they'll be fine. But if you snatch chains, you'll end up in jail because you know better." Chris Rock jail ends mother The Democrats should have an empty chair on stage for the entire DNC, and when anyone asks who it belongs to, they can say Osama bin Laden. Chris Rock osama-bin-laden empty should-have I saw the yearbook picture. There was six of them! I ain't have six friends in high school, I don't have six friends now! That's three on three with a half court. Chris Rock yearbook loner school There's math, and everything else is debatable! Chris Rock math Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive. Chris Rock race games kids Why do people do yoga? To clear their minds? I embrace the clutter in my head. Chris Rock yoga mind people God bless America. And no place else. Chris Rock head-of-state god-bless america Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to read with all this light.' Nobody give a fk about dads! Chris Rock sure-love dad light My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole. Chris Rock debt holes kids I'm pretty good at getting over people throwing stuff at me. If you've been doing stand up long enough you know how to swing back and get the laughs. Chris Rock laughing long people I'm happy if everybody else is. I'm a big brother, the oldest. If you're happy and I'm not, I'm cool with that. If I'm happy and you're not, I'm sad. Chris Rock im-sad bigs brother