You might be a redneck if your biggest ambition in life is to git that big ole coon. The one what hangs 'round over yonder, back'ah Bubba's barn. Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes From Jeff Foxworthy To me, the media in New York and LA have always missed the essence of this country. Jeff Foxworthy media new-york country You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born. Jeff Foxworthy redneck shooting kids You might be a redneck if your favorite Christmas present was a painting on black velvet. Jeff Foxworthy redneck velvet black You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't. Jeff Foxworthy redneck dresses might You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life. Jeff Foxworthy redneck texas might If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't juicy. Jeff Foxworthy juicy white looks If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll. Jeff Foxworthy maps veins looks If your stomach blocks your view of your feet, cover it up! The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. Now those little baby spare tires are kinda cute; tractor tires aren't! Especially if they've got hair on them! Jeff Foxworthy block cute baby You might be a redneck if you keep a fly swatter in the front seat of the car so you can reach your kids in the back seat of the car. Jeff Foxworthy redneck car kids I've got nothing against tattoos. I don't have one myself. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. It would say "Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again." Jeff Foxworthy tattoo august white You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house might You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor. Jeff Foxworthy redneck honor water You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up. Jeff Foxworthy redneck jeans cracks You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park. Jeff Foxworthy redneck nice wish You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument. Jeff Foxworthy redneck musical thinking You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups. Jeff Foxworthy redneck moon thinking You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'? Jeff Foxworthy redneck hey mouths You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison. Jeff Foxworthy redneck dad might You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance. Jeff Foxworthy redneck might jobs I was talking to Alan Jackson. He had his second Greatest Hits album. He said, You don't ever get into this really thinking you're gonna make it. Jeff Foxworthy albums talking thinking
