After we made love he took a piece of chalk and made an outline of my body. Joan Rivers More Quotes by Joan Rivers More Quotes From Joan Rivers The nice thing about Viagra is that they are proving men can go blind on it, so you can gain weight and have a great sex life. Joan Rivers nicemensex My personal style is over-the-top dowager. The old days they said get dressed and take one thing off, I say get dressed and put one thing on. Joan Rivers old-daysstylesaid I was not an attractive child. Joan Rivers attractivechildren Mick Jagger could French-kiss a moose. He has child-bearing lips. Joan Rivers lipskissingchildren I've learned from my dealings with Johnny Carson that no matter what kind of friendship you think you have with people you're working with, when the chips are down, it's all about business. Joan Rivers matterpeoplethinking Is Elizabeth Taylor fat? Her favorite food is seconds. Joan Rivers secondsfatsfood I don't mind aging, I just don't want to be a day older. Joan Rivers agingmindwant I am so out of the loop. I am never honored. My career is hilarious to me. I am either under the radar or over the radar. Joan Rivers honoredradarcareers I was absorbing a sorry truth of show business - rejection is the norm and acceptance the oddity. I was learning to cut the tops off my highs and stay with the lows where the rejections and letdowns would be shallow. Joan Rivers cuttingacceptancesorry Never floss a stranger. Joan Rivers strangeradvice I am definitely going to watch the Emmys this year! My makeup team is nominated for “Best Special Effects.†Joan Rivers makeupteambeauty I've learned: When you get older, who cares? I don't mince words, I don't hold back. What are you gonna do to me? Fire me? It's been done. Threaten to commit suicide? Done. Take away my show? Done! Not invite to me to the Vanity Fair party? I've never been invited! If I ever saw the invitation, I'd use it as toilet paper. Joan Rivers partysuicidefire Don't talk to me about gravity. When I get out of bed in the morning, I have to be careful not to step on my breasts. Joan Rivers bedbodymorning Having a baby is definitely a labor of love. Joan Rivers children-lovechildbirthbaby Having a baby can be a scream. Joan Rivers having-a-babyscreambaby Any form of complacency is the kiss of death for any professional. Joan Rivers complacencykissingform to maintain success, stamina is more important than talent. You have to learn to be a marathon runner. Joan Rivers perseveranceimportantsuccess I wear the midi because I feel if you're going to look ugly, you may as well look this year's ugly. Joan Rivers fashionlooksyears if you don't think that all life is improvisation, then you haven't been paying attention. Life is what happens to you while you're making other plans. Joan Rivers life-isattentionthinking The fun of working on the road means stealing from hotels. I've been doing it for so long, I have a set of towels from the Ark. Joan Rivers memorablefunmean