Dilbert: Evolution must be true because it is a logical conclusion of the scientific method. Scott Adams More Quotes by Scott Adams More Quotes From Scott Adams If you don't believe your salmon is wild, ask it to fetch your newspaper and see what happens. Scott Adams fetch salmon believe In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It’s called Karoshi. I don’t want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you see a bright light and hear dead relatives beckon. Scott Adams work funny death We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational. Scott Adams irrational wise Writers tend to work early in the morning, or late at night, when brains are naturally able to focus deeply on one thought. In the middle of the day, distractions are unavoidable. I wonder if anything worthwhile has ever been written in the afternoon. Scott Adams focus morning night Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. Scott Adams cartoonist obstacles spring For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George Meson. Scott Adams dollars names science Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free. Scott Adams rest-of-life My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right. Scott Adams old-life used made Home is pretty utopian. Scott Adams utopian home We're a planet of nearly six billion ninnies living in a civilization that was designed by a few thousand amazingly smart deviants. Scott Adams intelligence smart civilization I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society. Scott Adams age people thinking On the fourth day of telecommuting, I realized that clothes are totally unnecessary. Scott Adams nudists unnecessary clothes Everything you learn becomes a shortcut for understanding something else. Scott Adams shortcuts understanding Large corporations welcome innovation and individualism in the same way the dinosaurs welcomed large meteors. Scott Adams meteors innovation way There's no such thing as good ideas and bad ideas. There are only your own ideas and other people's. If you want someone to like your idea, tell him he said it first last week and you just remembered it. Scott Adams want people ideas Dilbert: You joined the "Flat Earth Society?" Dogbert: I believe the earth must be flat. There is no good evidence to support the so-called "round earth theory." Dilbert: I think Christopher Columbus would disagree. Dogbert: How convenient that your best witness is dead. Scott Adams science believe thinking Management is nature's way of removing idiots from the productive flow. Scott Adams flow wisdom way Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it. Scott Adams dilbert wisdom needs Am I getting smart with you? How would you know? Scott Adams smart wisdom knows A person with a flexible schedule and average resources will be happier than a rich person who has everything except a flexible schedule. Step one in your search for happiness is to continually work toward having control of your schedule. Scott Adams investing schedules average
