England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there. Bob Hope More Quotes by Bob Hope More Quotes From Bob Hope Somebody should tell Jerry Falwell that God is an Independent . . . he's not rich enough to be a Republican. Bob Hope humorous god funny It's amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn't sell theirs threw them away. Bob Hope next-day people television The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent's handshake. Bob Hope tired water funny It sure has been a pleasure for us to broadcast for the sailors and soldiers; besides, its part of the National Defence Program to prepare our boys for anything. Bob Hope soldier sailor boys You know, marriage is making a big comeback. I know personally that in Hollywood people are marrying people they never married before. Bob Hope married hollywood people You can calculate Zsa Zsa Gabor's age by the rings on her fingers. Bob Hope fingers rings age The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage. Bob Hope humor giving funny The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. Bob Hope soup humorous israel If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live. Bob Hope ifs I have too much money invested in sweaters. Bob Hope sweaters too-much If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about. Bob Hope balls worry golf I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half. Bob Hope lucky girl beautiful Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It's going to get us out of the house after dark! Bob Hope congratulations dark house We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot. Bob Hope play spring golf Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags. Bob Hope bags golf firsts Seventy years of ad-lib material, and I am speechless. Bob Hope one-line speechless years I've been playing golf a long time, although it's not really true that on my first round they strapped my bag on the back of a dinosaur. Bob Hope humorous golf funny Take nine strokes off your score. Skip the last hole. Bob Hope lasts nine golf Your ignorance cramps my conversation Bob Hope cramps ignorance conversation I'm so old they've cancelled my blood type. Bob Hope best-funny age blood