Happiness is lost by criticizing it; sorrow by accepting it. Ambrose Bierce More Quotes by Ambrose Bierce More Quotes From Ambrose Bierce DISABUSE, v.t. To present your neighbor with another and better error than the one which he has deemed advantageous to embrace. Ambrose Bierce embrace neighbor errors Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it. Ambrose Bierce party government running DISOBEDIENCE, n. The silver lining to the cloud of servitude. Ambrose Bierce silver sarcastic clouds In this world one must have a name; it prevents confusion, even when it does not establish identity. Some, though, are known by numbers, which also seem inadequate distinctions. Ambrose Bierce confusion names numbers EXILE, n. One who serves his country by residing abroad, yet is not an ambassador. Ambrose Bierce exile ambassadors country Fear has no brains; it is an idiot. Ambrose Bierce idiot fear brain Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth. Ambrose Bierce sarcastic purpose animal Scriptures - The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based. Ambrose Bierce writing book religion Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box. Ambrose Bierce boxes democracy government Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion. Ambrose Bierce cooking food religion Funeral: a pageant whereby we attest our respect for the dead by enriching the undertaker, and strengthen our grief by an expenditure that deepens our groans and doubles our tears. Ambrose Bierce grief suicide death PRE-ADAMITE, n. One of an experimental and apparently unsatisfactory race of antedated Creation. . . . Little its known of them beyond the fact that they supplied Cain with a wife and theologians with a controversy. Ambrose Bierce cain wife race Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head. Ambrose Bierce wise food men Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect. Ambrose Bierce god names funny Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook. Ambrose Bierce substance cooking food MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be. His chief occupation is extermination of other animals and his own species, which, however, multiplies with such insistent rapidity as to infest the whole habitable earth and Canada. Ambrose Bierce animal men thinking To seek a justification for a decision already made. Ambrose Bierce choices decision made As a means of dispensing formulated ignorance our boasted public school system is not without merit; it spreads out education sufficiently thin to give everyone enough to make him a more competent fool than he would have been without it. Ambrose Bierce ignorance mean school Before undergoing a surgical operation, arrange your temporal affairs. You may live. Ambrose Bierce doctors medicine humorous UNDERSTANDING, n. A cerebral secretion that enables one having it to know a house from a horse by the roof on the house. Its nature and laws have been exhaustively expounded by Locke, who rode a house, and Kant, who lived in a horse. Ambrose Bierce horse nature life
