I have noticed that in plays where the characters on stage laugh a great deal, the people out front laugh very little. Jean Kerr More Quotes by Jean Kerr More Quotes From Jean Kerr The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. Jean Kerr humorous real children If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation. Jean Kerr understanding losing success Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left. Jean Kerr marriage inspirational life You don't seem to realize that a poor person who is unhappy is in a better position than a rich person who is unhappy. Because the poor person has hope. He thinks money would help. Jean Kerr atheism unhappy thinking I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas? Jean Kerr tired beautiful beauty The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible. Jean Kerr good-morning average inspirational A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table. Jean Kerr divorce friendly jobs Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks. Jean Kerr cleaning women wish Confronted by an absolutely infuriating review, it is sometimes helpful for the victim to do a little personal research on the critic. Is there any truth to the rumor that he had no formal education beyond the age of eleven? In any event, is he able to construct a simple English sentence? Do his participles dangle? When moved to lyricism, does he write "I had a fun time"? Was he ever arrested for burglary? I don't know that you will prove anything this way, but it is perfectly harmless and quite soothing. Jean Kerr acceptance writing fun Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze? Jean Kerr espresso coffee hands Children are different - mentally, physically, spiritually, quantitatively, qualitatively; and furthermore, they're all a little bit nuts. Jean Kerr different nuts children Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it. Jean Kerr baby funny children Even though a number of people have tried, no one has yet found a way to drink for a living. Jean Kerr drinking numbers people If you have formed the habit of checking on every new diet that comes along, you will find that, mercifully, they all blur together, leaving you with only one definite piece of information: french-fried potatoes are out. Jean Kerr funny-inspirational loss food Some enterprising youth should go from door to door on Christmas morning peddling batteries. Jean Kerr christmas doors morning Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them. Jean Kerr creating talent people Don't be silly. I'm a mature, intelligent woman. Of course I'm afraid of my mother. Jean Kerr intelligent mother silly Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. Jean Kerr wedding marriage love Real men don't do pickup lines just to sweep off every girls' feet. They do and trust their own instincts knowing what the girls' wants and needs. Vying to win their hearts. Jean Kerr girl real heart I make mistakes; I'll be the second to admit it. Jean Kerr making-mistakes women mistake