I once truly believed that if I had to stand in line for twenty minutes to have a package gift-wrapped it actually gave the recipient more pleasure. Jean Kerr More Quotes by Jean Kerr More Quotes From Jean Kerr People only call you 'my dear' when they are irritated with you. Jean Kerr irritateddearpeople Years ago when a man began to notice that if he stood up on the subway he was immediately replaced by two people, he figured he was getting too fat. Jean Kerr mentwoyears I think if you can write a play, or produce a play, the first step toward success [is] if people don't want to kill themselves in the lobby. Now there must be four or five other steps, but that's the first. Jean Kerr playwritingthinking I have noticed that in plays where the characters on stage laugh a great deal, the people out front laugh very little. Jean Kerr playcharacterpeople I was always the last woman on the last down elevator as the store was closing. Jean Kerr elevatorsshoppinglasts I thought we talked things out!' 'Yes, and you listened very carefully to every word you had to say. Jean Kerr I don't grasp things this early in the day. I mean, I hear voices, all right, but I can't pick out the verbs. Jean Kerr voicemorningmean I know what I wish Ralph Nader would investigate next. Marriage. It's not safe, it's not safe at all. Jean Kerr nextsafewish Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in! Jean Kerr toughtoyscracks It has been explained to me that toys are packaged in shards, to be assembled by the middle-aged and butter-fingered, because this makes it easier for the shippers. ... If they had to spend hours and hours putting handlebars onto bicycles ... they would repent their ways and deliver something that looked like a rocking horse and not like the result of a small street accident. Jean Kerr horsetoysway While in some quarters it is felt that the critic is just a necessary evil, most serious-minded, decent, talented theater people agree that the critic is an unnecessary evil. Jean Kerr seriousevilpeople If you can keep your head when all about are losing theirs, it's just possible that you haven't grasped the situation. Jean Kerr seriousnesssituationlost I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep. That's deep enough. What do you want --an adorable pancreas? Jean Kerr Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck-if you survive you start looking very carefully to the right and left. Jean Kerr Even though a number of people have tried, no one has ever found a way to drink for a living. Jean Kerr Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. Jean Kerr I feel about airplaines the way I feel about diets. It seems to me they are wonderful things for other people to go on. Jean Kerr I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me they are wonderful things for other people to go on. Jean Kerr If you can keep your head about you when all about you are losing theirs, its just possible you haven't grasped the situation. Jean Kerr Life with Mary was like being in a telephone booth with an open umbrella-no matter which way you turned, you got it in the eye. Jean Kerr
