I read all the books I could find about manners, and the extraordinary thing was, in all books up to the end of the Second World War, most were directed at how to comport yourself in the presence of the ladies. Quentin Crisp More Quotes by Quentin Crisp More Quotes From Quentin Crisp To minimize my guilt at going to the pictures - to call this wanton pursuit of an effete pleasure by another name - I needed movie companions as drunkards need drinking partners. If I entered a cinema alone, God might plunge his arm through the roof of the auditorium booming in a stereophonic voice, 'And you, Crisp, what are you doing here?' I would never have dared reply, 'I'm just enjoying myself, Lord.' Quentin Crisp voicedrinkingnames The more people one has to love, the more one's capacity to love stretches. Quentin Crisp capacity-to-lovecapacitypeople The distinction between indoors and outdoors, which in England is usually so marked, was temporarily suspended in a hot gauzy haze. Quentin Crisp hazeenglandhot God, from whose territory I had withdrawn my ambassadors at the age of fourteen. It had become obvious that he was never going to do a thing I said. Quentin Crisp ambassadorsterritoryage Quentin Crisp (to handsome young man on the street): "What's the matter, sexy? Don't you like dehydrated fruit? Quentin Crisp handsomesexymen The programs constantly repeat themselves and one another. No one has yet had the nerve to say, 'As we have nothing sensible to tell you between now and 8:30, please tune in again then. Quentin Crisp nervestunestelevision Keeping up with the Joneses was a full-time job with my mother and father. It was not until many years later when I lived alone that I realized how much cheaper it was to drag the Joneses down to my level. Quentin Crisp motherjobsfunny The rest of the world in which I lived was still stumbling about in search of a weapon with which to exterminate this monster [homosexuality] whose shape and size were not yet known or even guessed at. It was thought to be Greek in origin, smaller than socialism but more deadly, especially to children. Quentin Crisp greekmonsterschildren The simplest comment on my book came from my ballet teacher. She said, "I wish you hadn't made every line funny. It's so depressing." Quentin Crisp depressingteacherbook Exhibitionism is like a drug. Hooked in adolescence I was now taking doses so massive they would have killed a novice. Quentin Crisp exhibitionismnovicesdrug Sometimes I wore a fringe so deep it obscured the way ahead. This hardly mattered. There were always others to look where I was going. Quentin Crisp sometimeslooksway Living en famille provides the strongest motives for rudeness combined with the maximum opportunity for displaying it. Quentin Crisp motiverudeopportunity If I have any talent at all, it is not for doing but for being. Quentin Crisp talentifs Even hooligans marry, though they know that marriage is for a little while. It is alimony that is for ever. Quentin Crisp alimonyknowslittles All liaisons between homosexuals are conducted as though they were between a chorus girl and a bishop. In some cases both parties think they are bishops. Quentin Crisp partygirlthinking Vice is its own reward. Quentin Crisp rewardsvirtuevices I like living in one room and have never known what people do with the room they are not in. Quentin Crisp knownpeoplerooms Muddled syntax is the outward and audible sign of confused minds, and the misuse of grammar the result of illogical thinking. Quentin Crisp confusedmindthinking As someone remarked, when told the new atomic bombs would explode without a bang, "they can't leave anything alone." Quentin Crisp atomic-bombbangsbombs Life is a game in which the rules are constantly changing; nothing spoils a game more than those who take it seriously. Adultery? Phooey! You should never subjugate yourself to another nor seek the subjugation of someone else to yourself. If you follow that Crispian principle you will be able to say Phooey, too, instead of reaching for your gun when you fancy yourself betrayed. Quentin Crisp gunprinciplesgames
