I will not take up your time, dear boy, with telling you what is the matter with me. Life is brief, and you might pass away before I had finished. But I will tell you what is NOT the matter with me. I have not got housemaid’s knee. Why I have not got housemaid’s knee, I cannot tell you; but the fact remains that I have not got it. Everything else, however, I HAVE got.

Jerome K. Jerome

Categorized in : Boys Might Passing Away

Nothing is more beautiful than the love that has weathered the storms of life. The love of the young for the young, that is the beginning of life. But the love of the old for the old, that is the beginning of things longer.

Jerome K. Jerome

storm beautiful love

Let your boat of life be light, packed with only what you need - a homely home and simple pleasures, one or two friends, worth the name, someone to love and someone to love you, a cat, a dog, and a pipe or two, enough to eat and enough to wear, and a little more than enough to drink; for thirst is a dangerous thing.

Jerome K. Jerome

inspirational love life

A good woman's arms round a man's neck is a lifebelt thrown out to him from heaven.

Jerome K. Jerome

good-woman women heaven

It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.

Jerome K. Jerome

truth liars funny

Some people are under the impression that all that is required to make a good fisherman is the ability to tell lies easily and without blushing; but this is a mistake. Mere bald fabrication is useless; the veriest tyro can manage that. It is in the circumstantial detail, the embellishing touches of probability, the general air of scrupulous - almost of pedantic - veracity, that the experienced angler is seen.

Jerome K. Jerome

air mistake lying

Opportunities flit by while we sit regretting the chances we have lost, and the happiness that comes to us we heed not, because of the happiness that is gone.

Jerome K. Jerome

regret opportunity happiness

If you are foolish enough to be contented, don't show it, but grumble with the rest; and if you can do with a little, ask for a great deal. Because if you don't you won't get any.

Jerome K. Jerome

enough foolish littles

He is very imprudent, a dog; he never makes it his business to inquire whether you are in the right or the wrong, never asks whether you are rich or poor, silly or wise, sinner or saint. You are his pal. That is enough for him.

Jerome K. Jerome

wise dog friendship

If there is one person I do despise more than another, it is the man who does not think exactly the same on all topics as I do.

Jerome K. Jerome

doe men thinking

It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.

Jerome K. Jerome

stupid silly funny

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.

Jerome K. Jerome

stress work success

That is just the way with Memory; nothing that she brings to us is complete. She is a willful child; all her toys are broken. I remember tumbling into a huge dust-hole when a very small boy, but I have not the faintest recollection of ever getting out again; and if memory were all we had to trust to, I should be compelled to believe I was there still.

Jerome K. Jerome

memories believe children

What I am looking for is a blessing not in disguise.

Jerome K. Jerome

fake-people humor happiness

Eat good dinners and drink good wine; read good novels if you have the leisure and see good plays; fall in love, if there is no reason why you should not fall in love; but do not pore over influenza statistics.

Jerome K. Jerome

falling-in-love wine play

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

Jerome K. Jerome

humorous work funny

Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it.

Jerome K. Jerome

teenage-love measles love

They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.

Jerome K. Jerome

dog silly funny

A glass of wine often makes me a better man than hearing a sermon.

Jerome K. Jerome

glasses wine men

The advantage of literature over life is that its characters are clearly defined, and act consistently.

Jerome K. Jerome

literature character life

It seems to me so shocking to see the precious hours of a man's life - the priceless moments that will never come back to him again - being wasted in a mere brutish sleep.

Jerome K. Jerome

priceless sleep men