It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt. Mark Twain More Quotes by Mark Twain More Quotes From Mark Twain Foreigners cannot enjoy our food, I suppose, any more than we can enjoy theirs. It is not strange; for tastes are made, not born. I might glorify my bill of fare until I was tired; but after all, the Scotchman would shake his head and say, 'Where's your haggis?' and the Fijan would sigh and say, 'Where's your missionary?' Mark Twain bills tired might Evolution is a blind giant who rolls a snowball down a hill. The ball is made of flakes-circumstances. They contribute to the mass without knowing it. They adhere without intention, and without foreseeing what is to result. When they see the result they marvel at the monster ball and wonder how the contriving of it came to be originally thought out and planned. Whereas there was no such planning, there was only a law: the ball once started, all the circumstances that happened to lie in its path would help to build it, in spite of themselves. Mark Twain knowing law lying Very well, then, where do we arrive? Where do we arrive with our respect, our homage, our filial affection? At Adam! At Adam, every time. We can't build a monument to a germ, but we can build one to Adam, who is in the way to turn myth in in fifty years and be entirely forgotten in two hundred. We can build a monument and save his name to the world forever, and we'll do it! Mark Twain names two years Jesus died to save men - a small thing for an immortal to do - and didn't save many, anyway. But if he had been damned for the race, that would have been act of a size proper to a god, and would have saved the whole race. Mark Twain race men jesus You can never find a Christian who has acquired this valuable knowledge, this saving knowledge, by any process but the everlasting and all-sufficient 'people say.' Mark Twain atheism christian people We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there. Mark Twain wisdom-experience knowledge-experience life There will never be a "perfect" time to quit smoking. A time when you don't have any distractions or stress... If you had started today one year ago, this would not even be an issue for you today! Don't waste another year! Mark Twain issues stress encouragement I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55. Mark Twain ass funny years Men write many fine and plausible arguments in support of monarchy, but the fact remains that where every man has a voice, brutal laws are impossible Mark Twain writing witty men It is a dear and lovely disposition, and a most valuable one, that can brush away indignities and discourtesies and seek and find the pleasanter features of an experience. Mark Twain disposition lovely optimistic That optimist of yours is always ready to turn hell's backyard into a play-ground. Mark Twain backyards optimistic play ...fry me an optimist for breakfast. Mark Twain optimist optimistic breakfast The pulpit and the optimist are always talking about the human race's steady march toward ultimate perfection. As usual, they leave out the statistics. It is the pulpit's way - the optimist's way. Mark Twain optimistic race talking Optimist: day-dreamer in his small clothes. Mark Twain optimism clothes optimistic Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch. Mark Twain ignorance men hands The ignorant are afraid to betray surprise or admiration...they think it ill manners. Mark Twain ignorant ignorance thinking ...ignorant as the unborne babe! ignorant as unborn twins! Mark Twain ignorant twins ignorance We never knew an ignorant person yet but was prejudiced. Mark Twain ignorant-person ignorant ignorance ...one should be gentle with the ignorant, for they are the chosen of God. Mark Twain ignorant ignorance should Therein lies the defect of revenge: it's all in the anticipation; the thing itself is a pain, not a pleasure; at least the pain is the biggest end of it. Mark Twain pain revenge lying
