It's wrong to discriminate based on skin color when there are so many other reasons not to like someone. Dennis Miller More Quotes by Dennis Miller More Quotes From Dennis Miller Why should I hate someone on the basis of their religion, when I can take a little time to get to know them and hate them for a myriad of real reasons. Dennis Miller hate real religion Warner had more hands in his face than an OB-GYN delivering Vishnu's triplets! Dennis Miller faces football hands I preume there are far too many abortions performed in this country. And I also believe that at the end of the day, as much as I might disapprove, none of them are really any of my business. Dennis Miller abortion believe country Nervous? He's tighter than Pat Buchanan's sphincter muscle at a 4th of July soiree on Fire Island. Dennis Miller 4th-of-july fire football Guilt is the reason they put the articles in Playboy. Dennis Miller playboy guilt reason That kid's got an arm like Uncle Fester at an exhibition of Pre-Colombian... um, Christ, I lost it. I was going for something thick. So what's with the beard, Grizzly Fouts? Dennis Miller uncles football kids I don't know about you, but in my neighborhood, they just opened a Starbucks... IN A STARBUCKS!!! Dennis Miller starbucks neighborhood knows I love this country for several reasons, not the least of which is that I know I'm allowed to hate it if I want to. Dennis Miller politics hate country Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. Dennis Miller home inspirational children I'd rather be funny than wise. Dennis Miller wise inspirational Somebody can say they don't understand why somebody drifts. But I've always found people who drift interesting, 'cause it shows me the game's not stagnant in their own head. They're thinking. Dennis Miller games interesting thinking Check out the helmet hair on Randy Moss, babe! He looks like some freakish anti-Mr. T after a long evening sleeping through 'Aida.' Dennis Miller hair sleep football Detroit's so bad this year they might lose their bye week. Dennis Miller nfl football years That secondary provides worse coverage than a Guatemalan HMO. Dennis Miller coverage football The French are always reticent to surrender to the wishes of their friends and always more than willing to surrender to the wishes of their enemies. Dennis Miller humor funny enemy It's your living room, it's your life, go nuts. You like Home Improvement? Tape it and go over it like it's the Zapruder film. Dennis Miller tape nuts home I'll say this about the war protesters: At least most of them are only putting duct tape across their mouths so I can still tell the rest of them to blow it out their ass. Dennis Miller tape blow war Ouch! And Marino goes down quicker than his Boonesfarm-infused sister in the back of my '68 Cutlass on our first date after watching 'Love Story' at the drive-in. Dennis Miller ouch stories football America was founded by puritans and like it or not the anti-pleasure dogma of those buckled-shoed killjoys still pervades our collective unconscious like an I-max shot of Dennis Franz's naked hairy cop ass. Hence, anything enjoyable is automatically forbidden and bad and in our panic to avoid it at all cost we become obsessed with it... like dressing up in a pink teddy and a pair of ugboots and repeatedly screaming the word 'VERBOTEN!' into a conk shell balanced on the back on a miniature pony... Oh, I see.. That would just be me. Dennis Miller dressing-up collective-unconscious america Bad television is three things: a bullet train to a morally bankrupt youth, a slow spiral into an intellectual void, and of course, a complete blast to watch. Dennis Miller intellectual watches funny