Let's get up here before we get killed! Henny Youngman More Quotes by Henny Youngman More Quotes From Henny Youngman "Doctor, my leg hurts. What can I do?" The doctor says, "Limp!" Henny Youngman humor hurt funny Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. Henny Youngman men funny thinking The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. Henny Youngman married wife way This man dresses like an unmade bed. Henny Youngman humor men funny A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday. Henny Youngman clothes yesterday men The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. Henny Youngman marriage anniversary love When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays. Henny Youngman doctors health funny A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months. Henny Youngman doctors survival men The usual way - a little wine, a little dinner. Henny Youngman wine usual way Everytime I ask what time it is, I get a different answer. Henny Youngman asks different answers A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe! Henny Youngman humor blow funny Nurse: "Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office". Doctor: "Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in." Henny Youngman humor men funny You look like a talent scout for a cemetery. Henny Youngman humor funny looks I just made a killing in the stock market -- I shot my broker. Henny Youngman shots killing made I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays. Henny Youngman christmas-wishes holiday atheist A man goes to a psychiatrist. "Nobody listens to me!" The doctor says, "Next!" Henny Youngman humor men funny If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving. Henny Youngman success inspirational funny Americans are getting stronger. Twenty years ago, it took two people to carry ten dollars' worth of groceries. Today, a five-year-old can do it. Henny Youngman sarcastic two years You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. Henny Youngman funny-love i-love-you marriage When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. Henny Youngman husband doors men
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