My idea of 'roughing it' is when you have to have an extension for your electric blanket. Erma Bombeck More Quotes by Erma Bombeck More Quotes From Erma Bombeck I read one psychologist's theory that said, "Never strike a child in your anger." When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he's recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday? Erma Bombeck sunday family children Housework can kill you if done right. Erma Bombeck done drinking work It is my theory you can't get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture. Erma Bombeck furniture funny moving How come anything you buy will go on sale next week? Erma Bombeck literature goes-on next-week Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on. Erma Bombeck two children ideas When you look like your passport photo, it's time to go home. Erma Bombeck humor home travel Did you ever notice that the first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone? Erma Bombeck inspirational funny travel Kids have little computer bodies with disks that store information. They remember who had to do the dishes the last time you had spaghetti, who lost the knob off the TV set six years ago, who got punished for teasing the dog when he wasn't teasing the dog and who had to wear girls boots the last time it snowed. Erma Bombeck girl dog kids Before you try to keep up with the Joneses, be sure they're not trying to keep up with you. Erma Bombeck keep-trying spiritual trying A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween. Erma Bombeck halloween fun relationship When humor go's, there go's civilization. Erma Bombeck sense-of-humor civilization When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies. Erma Bombeck tough-times chocolate naps Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub. Erma Bombeck age dog two I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes. Erma Bombeck clothes realizing lucky I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill. Erma Bombeck skiing hills sports I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along. Erma Bombeck fattening scientist worry A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn't charge more after midnight - or anything before midnight. Erma Bombeck grandparent midnight baby No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. Erma Bombeck women motivation sleep If I had my life to live over I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage. Erma Bombeck storage burned rose My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. Erma Bombeck car funny kids
