My job was basically to look at a good friend completely naked and rub lotion on her back. I was naked too, but I got to put a towel on almost immediately. So I was like, "Well, this is going to be embarrassing, but it's also going to be kinda awesome."

Rob Corddry

Categorized in : Jobs Naked Good Friend

Once I found out how much an Off-Off-Broadway actor makes, I was... by Rob Corddry

Once I found out how much an Off-Off-Broadway actor makes, I was whoring myself out the next day.

next-day broadway actors

If you have a secret, people will sit a little bit closer. by Rob Corddry

If you have a secret, people will sit a little bit closer.

humorous witty funny

I learned more about elections on election night 2000 than I ever did during my 16 years of schooling.

comedy night years

I like playing really super-intense, live-in-the-moment characters. It asks me to not phone it in. It's impossible to phone it in. Every American boy has spent his childhood pretending to get shot.

childhood character boys

If anything, there's more at stake when you're older, and more responsibility and more legitimate things to worry about.

stakes responsibility worry

I peed in my wife's boot once. On honeymoon, in Madrid, we were drinking absinthe and somehow made it back to our hotel. I don't remember a second of this, but my wife woke up to this noise. Two of her boots were in the corner, one had fallen down and the other was standing up and I was peeing into it! It was a hole, and it looked like a toilet. She said: "Rob, wake up, you're peeing into my shoe!"

shoes drinking two

I have a wife and two daughters; people who depend on me. Everything is more important than it was when I was 20. But now I'm like, "Eh, I made it this far."

daughter two people

I don't like gadgets for their own sake. I like gadgets that are tools. And I like simple gadgets that do one thing really well like a hammer.

hammers tools simple

I want to manufacture a feud. by Rob Corddry

I want to manufacture a feud.

It looks like garbage, my ass. But trust me, you're lucky it's no... by Rob Corddry

It looks like garbage, my ass. But trust me, you're lucky it's not full-frontal.

garbage lucky looks

I have to stay true to myself. by Rob Corddry

I have to stay true to myself.

true-to-myself stay-true

I am realizing how old I am 'cause I am meeting so many people that were born in the 80s, which is crazy to me that I was going through puberty and [they weren't] even alive.

alive crazy people

I touched an Oscar once. Friend of mine has one, for writing. As soon as I touched it, he said, Now you'll never win one.

oscars winning writing

I remember saying in college that I would never do commercials. by Rob Corddry

I remember saying in college that I would never do commercials.

comedy college remember

I actually got the part. And I thought, Well, I'll do it for a wh... by Rob Corddry

I actually got the part. And I thought, Well, I'll do it for a while. I'll just quit if it's stupid.

quitting comedy stupid

My mother was very, very Protestant. I grew up Presbyterian, and I went to church every Sunday until I was 18. I was forced to.

sunday church mother

I get all of my comedy from CNN. by Rob Corddry

I get all of my comedy from CNN.

I've got like a week and a half left, all bets are off. by Rob Corddry

I've got like a week and a half left, all bets are off.

fog comedy half

Pat OBrien knows nothing. Hes on the Hell express. by Rob Corddry

Pat OBrien knows nothing. Hes on the Hell express.

If it's January, I'm dead in three hours. But in June, I'd be hungry, but I'd make it out. I'd find my way without a map or compass. I say that with confidence. I can build a fire without a match.

three june fire