Never forget that the devil is there 24/7 too. He's very, very busy. Bill Cosby More Quotes by Bill Cosby More Quotes From Bill Cosby Dentists tell you not to pick your teeth with any sharp metal object. Then you sit in their chair and the first thing they grab is an iron hook. Bill Cosby iron humor funny A person with no children says, "Well I just love children," and you say "Why?" and they say, "Because a child is so truthful, that's what I love about 'em - they tell the truth." That's a lie, I've got five of 'em. The only time they tell the truth is if they're having pain. Bill Cosby pain funny children I love it when mothers get so mad they can't remember your name. "Come here, Roy, er, Rupert, er, Rutabaga... what is your name, boy? And don't lie to me, because you live here, and I'll find out who you are." Bill Cosby mother funny lying Ours is a youth culture, and like a golf tournament, we honor only low scores. Bill Cosby honor golf culture I use the exercise room early, because I don't want to get on the treadmill and everyone's going 'Oh, Bill Cosby,' and then they come around to see how fast I'm walking, and it becomes very competitive. Bill Cosby use want exercise As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by 'survival of the fittest.' Bill Cosby brother mother funny I don't wear no condom and I don't plan for no kids. Bill Cosby condom plans kids It is not a matter of who is rejecting me, as much as it is somebody may get it, and I am going to keep plowing through it because in this world of education, there is a harvest. Bill Cosby plowing education world It's more blessed to give than to receive - especially kittens. Bill Cosby blessed bible jesus I'm not the healthiest, but I am healthy. I'm healthy to the point where there are things that I have to eat that I don't want to eat, but I eat it because I'm enjoying staying alive. Bill Cosby healthy alive want I don't have a problem believing in God and Jesus. But in Genesis one has to wonder about these sentences that just go on and end without finishing. The thought is unfinished. Where did Adam go? What is he doing? Hello? There has to be some pages missing. Bill Cosby missing believe jesus The dentist drills some more and you hear him make a mistake. And to cover it up, they all say the same thing: "Okay, rinse." Bill Cosby humor mistake funny Meadowlark and I share a common vision of bringing joy and laughter to others. Bill Cosby common-vision laughter joy It doesn't make any difference how much money a father earns, his name is always Dad-Can-I.... Like all other children, my five have one great talent: they are gifted beggars. Not one of them ever ran into the room, looked up at me, and said, "I'm really happy that you're my father, and as a tangible token of my appreciation, here's a dollar. Bill Cosby dad appreciation children The mother may be doing ninety percent of the disciplining, but the father still must have a full-time acceptance of all the children. He never must say, "Get these kids out of here; I'm trying to watch TV." If he ever does start saying this, he is liable to see one of his kids on the six o'clock news. Bill Cosby mother father children We spoke to God about the children, and we were afraid to ask God for specific things. We thought that it might be too much. So we said to God 'Please give us a healthy child' and left it at that, not knowing that God is a generous God, but also has a sense of humor. And if you leave that much open for God, some wonderful jokes are going to come about. Bill Cosby knowing giving children I want to get violence - I want schools to start from K through 12 to just every day have teachers understand that they don't want to talk about anything that is violent, and they want to explain to the children how bad violence is and how behavior - violent behavior, is something that they really should not practice and think about. Bill Cosby teacher children school When I decided that I wanted to go to college, I wanted to be a school teacher for 7th and 8th grade boys because I felt that was an important time for them. I had gone astray at that point in my life and really wanted to help keep them from making the same mistake I had made. Bill Cosby mistake teacher school Brown versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem. Bill Cosby board-of-education boards white A father has to do everything in his power to keep a tight ship, even though he knows the crew would like to send him away in a dinghy. Bill Cosby dinghies ships father
