People are the same wherever you go. And if they weren't, they wouldn't laugh at the same s**t. Chris Rock More Quotes by Chris Rock More Quotes From Chris Rock I never wanted to churn it out. Comedians tend to work all the time. They never put it down like musicians who might make an album then take three or four years off to recharge their batteries. Comedians tend to work straight through and they get stale because of that. Even when I didn't have a lot of money I never ever did it unless I had something new to say. Chris Rock comedianalbumsyears Don't argue! You cannot win, you cannot beat a woman in a arguement. It's impossble you will not win. Cause men, we are handicapped when it comes to arguing cause we have a need to make sense Chris Rock humormenfunny Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy. Chris Rock activitygroupscomedy Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks. Chris Rock holiday4th-of-julywhite My relationship with my daughter is gonna affect her relationship with men for the rest of her life... Sometimes I'm walking with my daughter. I'm pushing her in the stroller, and sometimes I just pick her up and stare at her, and I realize, my only job in life is to keep her off the pole. Chris Rock daughterjobsmen Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special. Chris Rock halloweenstarsfunny A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material. Chris Rock clubswork-outtrying A black Christian is like a black person with no memory. Chris Rock blackchristianmemories Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest! Chris Rock dancehumorfunny If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what they want to do. When you are raised by two parents, you are constantly watching compromise take place. Just by observing that, it made me a better person. Chris Rock parenttwoworld I think it’s better to have ideas. You can change an idea; changing a belief is trickier. Chris Rock beliefideasthinking You can't have anything valuable in your house. Niggers will break in and take it all! Everything white people don't like about black people, black people don't like about black people. It's like our own personal civil war. On one side, there's black people. On the other, you've got niggers. The niggers have got to go. I love black people, but I hate niggers. I am tired of niggers. Tired, tired, tired. Chris Rock tiredhatewar Women need food, water, and compliments That's right. And an occasional pair of shoes. Chris Rock shoeswaterneeds I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot. Chris Rock rockshumorfunny Only black people in the whole neighborhood, so let's break it down: Me, I'm a decent comedian, I'm a'ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the white man that lives next door to me does for a living? He's a f*****g dentist. Chris Rock rapperdoorsmen Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can all sell drugs. Being a pimp is a whole other thing. Chris Rock drughumorfunny You can't be happy that fire cooks your food and be mad it burns your fingertips. Chris Rock fingertipsmadfire Yeah, it's unfair that you can get judged by something you didn't do, but it's also unfair that you can inherit money that you didn't work for. Chris Rock judgedunfairyeah No matter what happens or how difficult things become, you will eventually feel better. Chris Rock difficultfeel-bettermatter Hollywood's racist. Hollywood is sorority racist. It's like - we like you, Rhonda, but you're not a Kappa. Chris Rock rockshollywoodawards
