She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body." Detective Cavuto Christopher Moore More Quotes by Christopher Moore More Quotes From Christopher Moore I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores. Christopher Moore haremlice The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear. Christopher Moore dearbeast The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept. Christopher Moore drawersbigsgone The bat was looking at Theo and Theo was having trouble following his own thoughts.The bat was wearing tiny sunglasses.Ray Bans,Theo could see by the trademark in the corner of one lens."I'm sorry, Mr.,uh- Case, could you take the bat off your head.It's very distracting." Him." Pardon?" It's a him.Roberto.He no like the light. Christopher Moore rayslightsorry The value of the work we do is the value we give to it. Christopher Moore valuesgiving May the IRS find that you deduct your pet sheep as an entertainment expense. Christopher Moore irspetsheep I fink I gots deaf on me willie. Christopher Moore deaf Cofishes-other fish in a group, coworkers, cohorts, etc. Shut up, it's a word. Christopher Moore coworkeretcgroups I love you above all things, even pie. Christopher Moore pieall-thingslove-you It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. . .a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale. Christopher Moore cheerselfmen Life is loneliness, broken only by the gods taunting us with friendship and the odd bonk Christopher Moore lonelinessbrokenlife-is She pulled down the blanket and aimed baby Sophie's bottom at him like she might unleash a fusillade of weapons-grade poopage such as the guileless Beta Male had never seen. Christopher Moore sophiemalesbaby No one knows why, but second only to eating the brains of the living, the dead love affordable prefab furniture. Christopher Moore furnitureeatingbrain I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry. Christopher Moore colorfulangryi-can She's so small, yet she contains so much evil. Christopher Moore evil Mr. Fresh looked up. "The book says if we don't do our jobs everything could go dark, become like the Underworld. I don't know what the Underworld is like, Mr. Asher, but I've caught some of the road show from there a couple of times, and I'm not interested in finding out. How 'bout you?" "Maybe it's Oakland," Charlie said. "What's Oakland?" "The Underworld." "Oakland is not the Underworld!" "The Tenderloin?" Charlie suggested. Christopher Moore couplejobsbook Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates. Christopher Moore hatekidspeople Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness. Christopher Moore toastersbadassdarkness Actually, orcas aren't quite as complex as scientists imagine. Most killer whales are just four tons of doofus dressed up like a police car. Christopher Moore whalescarpolice Stop," I said. "Please do not further endorken yourself to me. You have great hair and a car that is most fly, and you have just saved me with your mad ninja driving skills, so do not sully your heroic hottie image in my mind by further reciting your nerdy scholastic agenda. Don't tell me what you're studying, Steve, tell me what's in your soul. What haunts you?" And he was like, "Dude, you need to cut back on the caffeine. Christopher Moore cuttingskillshair
