The brain is like a TV set; when it goes blank, it's a good idea to turn off the sound. Sam Ewing More Quotes by Sam Ewing More Quotes From Sam Ewing A neighbor will stand at your door talking for 20 minutes because she doesn't have time to come in. Sam Ewing neighbordoorstalking The average tourist wants to go to places where there are no tourists. Sam Ewing tourismtouristsaverage Vacation: Two weeks on the sunny sands - and the rest of the year on the financial rocks. Sam Ewing vacationholidayrocks Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about. Sam Ewing frustrationtalkingfunny Life begins as a quest of the child for the man, and ends as a journey by the man to rediscover the child. Sam Ewing successhappinesschildren The trouble with giving advice is that others want to return the favor. Sam Ewing favorsadvicegiving We are all born into the world with nothing. Everything we acquire after that is profit. Sam Ewing bornwisdomworld Many trees could be saved if the government stopped printing tax forms. Sam Ewing printinggovernmenttree If you believe the past can't be changed, you haven't read a celebrity's autobiography. Sam Ewing changedbelievepast Wouldn't you like to weigh what it says on your driver's license? Sam Ewing driverslicense "Tell me, doctor, " said the patient, "when I stand on my head, the blood rushes to it. Why doesn't it rush to my feet now?" "That's because your feet aren't empty," said the doctor. Sam Ewing doctorsfeetblood Nobody's too fat - they're just too short. Sam Ewing insultfatstoo-short Half of all home accidents happen in the kitchen, and the family has to eat them. Sam Ewing kitchenhalfhome Success is when your name is in everything but the telephone directory. Sam Ewing telephonesnames Crime in the cities is very discouraging. Apartment house dwellers have locks, bolts, chains and bars on their doors. It takes a tenant longer to get out than a burglar to get in. Sam Ewing citieshousedoors Nobody ever asks a father how he manages to combine marriage and a career. Sam Ewing boyfriendcareersfather When a husband says, "I run things in my home" he may mean the washing machine, the dishwasher and the vacuum cleaner. Sam Ewing husbandhomerunning A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime. Sam Ewing dreammennight On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, "Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device". The question is, why doesn't the plane just become a boat? Sam Ewing boatflightstupidity Don't drive as if you own the road; drive as if you own the car. Sam Ewing carwisdomifs
