The Senate is the only show in the world where the cash customers have to sit in the balcony. Gracie Allen More Quotes by Gracie Allen More Quotes From Gracie Allen Try to understand me. Nothing is impossible. Gracie Allen understand-meimpossibletrying All the other candidates are making speeches about how much they have done for their country, which is ridiculous. I haven't done anything yet, and I think it's just common sense to send me to Washington and make me do my share. Gracie Allen common-sensecountrythinking I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best. Gracie Allen inspirationalfunnybook I'm the candidate who forgot to take off her hat before she threw it in the ring. Gracie Allen candidateshatsrings I'm having my platform run up by a movie set designer, so it will be very impressive from the front, but not too premanent. After all, there's no sense putting a lot of time and thought into something you'll have no use for after you're elected. Gracie Allen designeruserunning Every man is born with the ability to do something well. This is what the Lord intended him to do. Using that ability - what life is all about. Gracie Allen lordmenlife Let's all pull together and make these United States the grandest place in this whole country. I see a vision. A glorious vision. A united people, marching forward shoulder to shoulder, giving their all for the common good, working while I whistle. Gracie Allen givingcountrypeople You've buttered your bread, now sleep in it. Gracie Allen breadsleep It's foolish to bet on a horse without talking to him first. I know it seems silly to ask a horse who's going to win a race - but it's no sillier than asking anyone else. Gracie Allen horsewinningsilly This country needs room to grow and expand. In all my own newspapers I read frightful tales of the shameful atrocities being perpetrated on our Democratic minorities in Maine and Vermont. My patience is almost at an end, and if provoked much further I will place both countries under American protection, even if I have to send in my tourists to start trouble so I'll have to send in a force to restore order. Gracie Allen maineordercountry A young boy shouldn't be given up for hopeless just because he's lazy, surly, and good for nothing. Don't be discouraged by those things - maybe he's just trying to be like his daddy. Gracie Allen daddyboysfunny You kissed me like that when I was a blushing bride ...? I wonder what I was blushing about? Gracie Allen blushingfunny-marriagewonder Education is worth a whole lot. Just think - with enough education and brains the average man would make a good lawyer - and so would the average lawyer. Gracie Allen averagementhinking When my mother had to get dinner for 8 she'd just make enough for 16 and only serve half. Gracie Allen mothers-daymominspiring As a well-known great man would have said if he had thought of it, "Don't go around offending people just because it can be done sitting down." Gracie Allen offendingmenpeople Every politician must be able to keep both feet on the fence with his ear to the ground. Gracie Allen ableearsfeet When you learn to make everybody happy, you will possess the golden secret of how to milk the contented voters. But do it in such a way that they won't think you want them to vote for you just because you need the money. They need the money, and besides, they can think up other reasons if they try. Gracie Allen secrettryingthinking Cultivate friendships. If you don't have time to cultivate all of them, plow under every fifth one and collect your bonus. Gracie Allen fifthbonusifs Brains, integrity, and force may be all very well, but what you need today is Charm. Go ahead and work on your economic programs if you want to, I'll develop my radio personality. Gracie Allen I left my car parked at the top of Lombard Street Hill, and I forgot to put the breaks on. It's the funniest thing. The car is running down the hill. Gracie Allen hillscarrunning
