...there was practically one handwriting common to the whole school when it came to writing lines. It resembled the movements of a fly that had fallen into an ink-pot, and subsequently taken a little brisk exercise on a sheet of foolscap by way of restoring the circulation.

P. G. Wodehouse

Categorized in : School Writing Taken

I always advise people never to give advice.

P. G. Wodehouse

humorous inspirational people

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

P. G. Wodehouse

real giving people

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

P. G. Wodehouse

reading beautiful friendship

Everything in life that’s any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.

P. G. Wodehouse

fattening illegal fun

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.

P. G. Wodehouse

melancholy depression men

Always get to the dialogue as soon as possible. I always feel the thing to go for is speed. Nothing puts the reader off more than a big slab of prose at the start.

P. G. Wodehouse

slabs speed bigs

Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.

P. G. Wodehouse

sober motto

Some minds are like soup in a poor restaurant—better left unstirred.

P. G. Wodehouse

poor soup mind

An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.

P. G. Wodehouse

doctors humor funny

I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.

P. G. Wodehouse

sweetness strive light

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

P. G. Wodehouse

humorous sports death

There are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, 'Do trousers matter?'" "The mood will pass, sir.

P. G. Wodehouse

jeeves moments matter

It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't.

P. G. Wodehouse

hunting humorous ideas

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

P. G. Wodehouse

wrong-number voice humorous

Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.

P. G. Wodehouse

parent eye son

One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.

P. G. Wodehouse

telling-the-truth moments life-is

As Shakespeare says, if you're going to do a thing you might as well pop right at it and get it over.

P. G. Wodehouse

wells pops might

One of the poets, whose name I cannot recall, has a passage, which I am unable at the moment to remember, in one of his works, which for the time being has slipped my mind, which hits off admirably this age-old situation.

P. G. Wodehouse

age names mind

It is true of course, that I have a will of iron, but it can be switched off if the circumstances seem to demand it.

P. G. Wodehouse

iron demand circumstances

A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.

P. G. Wodehouse

humorous dark life