To be a dramatic writer takes hard work, talent, and discipline. And that's why I just make up crap. Colin Mochrie More Quotes by Colin Mochrie More Quotes From Colin Mochrie Onstage I do all the stuff I'd never do in real life, like lashing out at people who make me mad or freaking out in a long bank lineup. Performing allows me to fulfill all the sicko fantasies I've ever had. Colin Mochrie madreallong I believe it was Shakespeare who said, 'All the world's a stage, and you are CRAP!' Colin Mochrie stagebelieveworld NASA sends probe to Uranus, people everywhere giggle. Colin Mochrie nasagigglepeople I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work. Colin Mochrie individualismpracticalslines This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3. Colin Mochrie beverly-hillsclevelandhills My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos! Colin Mochrie mothercountrymoving Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin! Colin Mochrie muffinslibertygiving And if that isnt the truth, it would be a lie. Colin Mochrie ifswould-belying I don't want to get all lefty, but if we took the defence budgets from around the world, we could end hunger everywhere. I would hope that all the world's leaders are thinking about poverty. Get to work. Do something. This is something that's going to be with us forever. Colin Mochrie leaderforeverthinking The comedy community is fairly supportive of human beings in general. There are some things you can teach with comedy that people can't learn by being hit over the head with facts. I think, as comedians, we're trying to change the world. It's slow, but sure. Colin Mochrie communitypeoplethinking It all started with a badly timed bald joke! Colin Mochrie jokes There are so many things I'd like to change in the industry. Everything from the reliance of style over substance to their reluctance to hire me for big budget blockbusters, but the thing I would love most would be if they understood people don't have to be Hollywood beautiful to be sexy or interesting. Colin Mochrie sexybeautifulpeople The Hills are alive with the sound of CRAP! Colin Mochrie hillssound-and-musicalive I have so many evil plans, I'm just trying to find the one which would be best right now! Colin Mochrie would-beeviltrying Let me play a Man in a scene. Colin Mochrie sceneplaymen There's many times this year I've sat back and thought, I'm making a living from making things up. It's the only skill I have so I've been really lucky. Colin Mochrie luckyskillsyears I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs. Colin Mochrie handsomeifsbeauty I think the challenge is going out in front of a paying audience with absolutely nothing and trying to entertain them for two hours. Thankfully, I only think about that right before we go on, and then once we're out there, everything's fine. Colin Mochrie challengestwothinking You know, if I don't make it when I go out there in that weather balloon into that thunder storm. I want, you to take your ear and give it to my wife. Colin Mochrie wifeweathergiving As a kid I watched television 24 hours a day and loved every minute of it. The two shows that always make me laugh and are therefore my favorites are The Dick Van Dyke Show and Fawlty Towers. Colin Mochrie laughingtwokids
