What the meaning of human life may be I don't know: I incline to suspect that it has none. H. L. Mencken More Quotes by H. L. Mencken More Quotes From H. L. Mencken The Jews could be put down very plausibly as the most unpleasant race ever heard of. As commonly encountered they lack any of the qualities that mark the civilized man: courage, dignity, incorruptibility, ease, confidence. They have vanity without pride, voluptuousness without taste, and learning without wisdom. Their fortitude, such as it is, is wasted upon puerile objects, and their charity is mainly a form of display. H. L. Mencken vanitypridemen No professional politician is ever actually in favor of public economy. It is his implacable enemy, and he knows it. All professional politicians are dedicated wholeheartedly to waste and corruption. They are the enemies of every decent man. H. L. Mencken favorsmenenemy If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. H. L. Mencken politicalmissionarypromise Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under. H. L. Mencken freedomintegritymen The average man never really thinks from end to end of his life. The mental activity of such people is only a mouthing of cliches. What they mistake for thought is simply a repetition of what they have heard. My guess is that well over 80 percent of the human race goes through life without having a single original thought. H. L. Mencken mistakementhinking Liberty is of small value to the lower third of humanity. They greatly prefer security, which means protection by some class above them. They are always in favor of despots who promise to feed them. The only liberty an inferior man really cherishes is the liberty to quit work, stretch out in the sun, and scratch himself. H. L. Mencken classmenmean The common argument that crime is caused by poverty is a kind of slander on the poor. H. L. Mencken criminalshumorfunny It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man. H. L. Mencken humorouswittyfunny Never underestimate the booberie of the booboisie. H. L. Mencken never-underestimateunderestimate It reminds me of a string of wet sponges; it reminds me of tattered washing on the line; it reminds me of stale bean soup, of college yells, of dogs barking idiotically through endless nights. It is so bad that a sort of grandeur creeps into it. It drags itself up out of the dark abyss of pish and crawls insanely up the topmost pinnacle of posh. It is rumble and bumble. It is flap and doodle. It is balder and dash. H. L. Mencken humordogdark There are two impossibilities in life: "just one drink" and "an honest politician." H. L. Mencken honestdrinkingtwo Unsuccessful candidates for the Presidency should be quietly hanged as a matter of public sanitation and decorum. H. L. Mencken decorumshouldmatter Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies. When they fail to come off its clergy simply say that they will be realized later on. Thus, if we have another boom, they will argue that the collapse of capitalism is only postponed. The fact that the greatest booms ever heard of followed Marx's formal prophecy of the downfall of capitalism is already forgotten, just as millions have long since forgotten the early Christian prophecy that the end of the world was at hand. The first Christians accepted postponements as docilely as the Communists of today. H. L. Mencken christianlonghands School days, I believe, are the unhappiest in the whole span of human existence. They are full of dull, unintelligible tasks, new and unpleasant ordinances, brutal violations of common sense and common decency. It doesn't take a reasonably bright boy long to discover that most of what is rammed into him is nonsense, and that no one really cares very much whether he learns it or not. H. L. Mencken boysbelieveschool A professional politician is a professionally dishonorable man. In order to get anywhere near high office he has to make so many compromises and submit to so many humiliations that he becomes indistinguishable from a streetwalker. H. L. Mencken freedommenorder The older I get the more I admire and crave competence, just simple competence, in any field from adultery to zoology. H. L. Mencken adulteryfieldssimple The notion that a radical is one who hates his country is naïve and usually idiotic. He is, more likely, one who likes his country more than the rest of us, and is thus more disturbed than the rest of us when he sees it debauched. He is not a bad citizen turning to crime; he is a good citizen driven to despair. H. L. Mencken patriotismhatecountry Of all the human qualities, the one I admire the most is competence. A tailor who is really able to cut and fit a coat seems to me an admirable man, and by the same token a university professor who knows little or nothing of the thing he presumes to teach seems to me to be a fraud and a rascal. H. L. Mencken university-professorscuttingmen A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. H. L. Mencken humorflowerfunny Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. H. L. Mencken anniversaryloverelationship
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