Quotes by Redneck You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat. Jeff Foxworthy redneck ostriches cowboy You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap. Jeff Foxworthy redneck rope might You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded. Jeff Foxworthy redneck class school You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck. Jeff Foxworthy redneck tanks office If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck. Jeff Foxworthy redneck car feet You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold. Jeff Foxworthy bingo redneck grandmother You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school. Jeff Foxworthy redneck daddy school You might be a redneck if you're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing I Will Always Love You. Jeff Foxworthy redneck singing love-you You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item. Jeff Foxworthy gourmet redneck onions You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. Jeff Foxworthy redneck your-mom might You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub. Jeff Foxworthy redneck age numbers You might be a redneck if your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events. Jeff Foxworthy redneck events giving You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house watches You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house might You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test. Jeff Foxworthy redneck trials thinking You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool. Jeff Foxworthy redneck telephones coffee You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice. Jeff Foxworthy redneck shopping home You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. Jeff Foxworthy redneck dog house You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland. Jeff Foxworthy redneck ifs might You might be a redneck if you were shooting pool when your kids were born. Jeff Foxworthy redneck shooting kids «1234567891011»