... all of us talk faster than we listen. Andy Rooney More Quotes by Andy Rooney More Quotes From Andy Rooney Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens. Andy Rooney golf watches funny One of the things we can be sure of over the July 4th weekend is that news reports will keep telling us how many of us are going to die in automobile accidents. Andy Rooney news weekend 4th-of-july Almost all of us have an elevator or two in our lives somewhere. We wait for them, we ride on them. We're annoyed by the wait but pleased with the lift. Andy Rooney annoyed waiting two People waiting for an elevator don't know what to do, standing with strangers. There is nothing to do. Its an uneasy time. Some press the button repeatedly as though it would help. Andy Rooney buttons waiting people You can't be a good writer without being a good thinker. Andy Rooney thinker good-writers writing As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book. Andy Rooney phones secret book Where some people may see loving grandparents, I see a pair of feckless boobs who can't drive, take way too long to shop, and don't even have the most basic grasps on the new technology. As a staunch supporter of the principles of Darwinism, I think that advances in modern medicine are starting to overrule the survival of the fittest, and it's to our [youngers'] detriment. Andy Rooney medicine technology thinking Walking is good for the soul. Andy Rooney soul walking We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare. Andy Rooney college home night The best thing about a vacation is planning it. Andy Rooney best-things vacation planning Love is more pleasant once you get out of your twenties. It doesn't hurt all the time. Andy Rooney twenties hurt love Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. Andy Rooney milk scotch inspirational My advice is not to wait to be struck by an idea. If you're a writer, you sit down and damn well decide to have an idea. That's the way to get an idea. Andy Rooney waiting advice ideas Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic calling. Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love. Andy Rooney being-positive tests calling I know a lot of you believe that most people in the news business are liberal. Let me tell you, I know a lot of them, and they were almost evenly divided this time. Half of them liked Senator Kerry; the other half hated President Bush. Andy Rooney president believe people Phyllis Schlafly speaks for all American women who oppose equal rights for themselves. Andy Rooney equal speak rights All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law. Andy Rooney literature law men The fastest thing computers do is go obsolete. Andy Rooney adaptability obsolete computer In a conversation, keep in mind that you're more interested in what you have to say than anyone else is. Andy Rooney mind conversation When there are starving people in the world, it seems wrong that so many of us Americans eat as much for entertainment as for nourishment. Andy Rooney cooking food people