He's the only man I ever knew who had rubber pockets so he could steal soup. Wilson Mizner More Quotes by Wilson Mizner More Quotes From Wilson Mizner Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down. Wilson Mizner successgraduationinspirational The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong. Wilson Mizner ill-temperedangerpeople If you steal from one author it's plagiarism; if you steal from many it's research. Wilson Mizner hilariousinspirationalfunny Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave. Wilson Mizner carpe-diemhumilityhumble The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. Wilson Mizner humorfriendshipfunny The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more. Wilson Mizner insomniasleeptime The first hundred years are the hardest. Wilson Mizner birthdayyearsfirsts Money is the only substance which can keep a cold world from nicknaming a citizen Hey, you Wilson Mizner citizenssubstanceworld I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at. Wilson Mizner laughterjudginglaughing I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought. Wilson Mizner experiencelearningpeople A slave has but one master. An ambition man, has as many as there are people who helped him get his fortune. Wilson Mizner ambitionmenpeople A drama critic is a person who surprises the playwright by informing him what he meant. Wilson Mizner theatrecriticismdrama I know of no sentence that can induce such immediate and brazen lying as the one that begins, 'Have you read - .' Wilson Mizner sentencesknowslying The most efficient water power in the world - women's tears. Wilson Mizner tearswaterworld I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education. Wilson Mizner faitheducationteacher I've spent several years in Hollywood, and I still think the movie heroes are in the audience. Wilson Mizner movieherothinking To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady. Wilson Mizner embarrassmentbornbed Do not be desirous of having things done quickly. Do not look at small advantages. Desire to have things done quickly prevents their being done thoroughly. Looking at small advantages prevents great affairs from being accomplished. Wilson Mizner achievementdesirelooks A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while, he knows something. Wilson Mizner successpositiverelationship It's getting so people no longer count the silverware when I come to dinner. Wilson Mizner dinnerpeople
