I have this mistress: show business. Ray Romano More Quotes by Ray Romano More Quotes From Ray Romano When you wake up one day and say, "You know what? I don't think I ever need to sleep or have sex again." Congratulations, you're ready (to have children). Ray Romano baby funny sex In school, I wasn't a very good student - I was very irresponsible and never did the studying but always liked to get the laugh. Ray Romano students laughing school If golf wasn't enjoyable and there wasn't a lot of humor and enjoyment, even though the game is so frustrating, you would wonder why you put yourself through it. Ray Romano games wonder golf I don't want to say work is who I am, but some people feel more centered and more whole when they're producing and creating. Ray Romano creating who-i-am people I would get my student loans, get money, register and never really go. It was a system I thought would somehow pan out. Ray Romano get-money loan students The best comedy, I feel, comes in a drama because it balances each other out. Ray Romano comedy balance drama My daughter's tricycle said "Some Assembly Required." It came in a jar. Ray Romano assembly daughter jars My career has been my craziest adventure. Ray Romano craziest careers adventure My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning. Ray Romano funny-love family motivational Failure-it centers me. Too much success has me thinking, All right, what's goin' on? Ray Romano failure too-much thinking I had to be naked [in Vinyl], but I was almost more nervous about having to be drunk. The director wasn't going to yell, "Too big!," during the nude scene. For the drunk scene, you can be bad drunk or good drunk. We'll see. My wife was not happy, hearing about it. Ray Romano drunk wife directors Whenever I get down about life going by too quickly, what helps me is a little mantra that I repeat to myself: at least I'm not a fruit fly. Ray Romano fruit-flies helping littles I did 15 shows a week when I lived in New York. I did five shows on a Friday and seven shows on a Saturday. It was everything I did and it was my sole source of income. Ray Romano income friday new-york That's the one thing I have over any twenty-one-year-old: a proud history of accumulated neuroses. That's the game in which I'm da man. Ray Romano games men years Well, I'm a 14 handicap. Anyone who golfs knows what that means. Ray Romano handicaps wells mean You might think that's an exaggeration but believe me, if you leave twin two-year-olds alone in your living room, at some point a cow will be airborne. Ray Romano two believe thinking You know, before I would think, my cab driver hates me. Now I think my limo driver hates me. Ray Romano cab-drivers hate thinking If my father had hugged me even once, I'd be an accountant right now. Ray Romano accountants hug fathers-day If you are someone, you know, with fame, whatever amount, it's good to be married to someone who's not impressed with that at all. Ray Romano married knows fame The comics that are just conversing with you up there and drawing on their own life, yeah, I guess so. I guess some do political humor, some do topical humor, but the ones that I like, the ones that are appealing to me, were guys who were just talking to you about their life. Ray Romano drawing humor talking