Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story. by Adam Carolla

Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.

Adam Carolla

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My first car was a motorcycle. by Adam Carolla

My first car was a motorcycle.

motorcycle car firsts

The very definition of 'beauty' is outside. by Adam Carolla

The very definition of 'beauty' is outside.

definition-of-beauty definitions

If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, th... by Adam Carolla

If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.

built done bridges

I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.

strong people thinking

When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.

team basketball brother

I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

differences humor funny

I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have to do with reality.

reality art thinking

I am not a good cue card reader. by Adam Carolla

I am not a good cue card reader.

reader cards

I know everything because I know nothing. by Adam Carolla

I know everything because I know nothing.

knows

The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences wa... by Adam Carolla

The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.

horrible horrible-jobs jobs

It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anyt... by Adam Carolla

It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.

kids

Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bothe... by Adam Carolla

Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!

atheist men sex

When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself. by Adam Carolla

When you're doing a radio show, you can express yourself.

express-yourself radio shows

That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.

dream writing sports

He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a thr... by Adam Carolla

He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.

guy humor funny

My motto is "more mystery, less history". by Adam Carolla

My motto is "more mystery, less history".

my-motto motto mystery

Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they're so suggestible.

humor giving funny

Welfare is monetary methadone. by Adam Carolla

Welfare is monetary methadone.

monetary methadone welfare

I don't know anything about computers. by Adam Carolla

I don't know anything about computers.

computer knows

When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.

growing-up humor funny