On the Continent there is one topic which should be avoided-the weather; in England, if you do not repeat the phrase "Lovely day, isn't it?" at least two hundred times a day, you are considered a bit dull. George Mikes More Quotes by George Mikes More Quotes From George Mikes In Moscow they do not pay much attention to the living but keep their cemeteries in a splendid state. George Mikes russia humorous funny Humility is one of the most repulsive virtues, nearly always false. George Mikes humor humility funny When a wicked and unworthy subject annoyed the Sultan of Turkey or the Czar of Russia, he had his head cut of without much ceremony; but when the same happened in England, the monarch declared : "We are not amused". George Mikes cutting humorous funny People on the Continent either tell you the truth or lie; in England they hardly ever lie, but they would not dream of telling you the truth. George Mikes dream funny lying The English take everything with an exquisite sense of humour. They are only offended if you tell them that they have no sense of humour. George Mikes exquisite humour language Continental people have a sex life; the English have hot-water bottles. George Mikes water-bottles funny sex Rich people (in Australia) have swimming pools in their gardens but, at least, they do swim in them. George Mikes swimming humor funny If somebody tells you an obviously untrue story, on the Continent you would remark, "You are a liar, Sir, and a rather dirty one at that." In England you just say "Oh, is that so?" Or "That's rather an unusual story, isn't it? George Mikes stories liars dirty In England the boy pats his adored one on the back and says softly, "I don't object, you know." If he is quite mad with passion, he may add: "I rather fancy you, in fact. George Mikes mad passion boys 'I don't say a Zionist must be insane,' said President Weizmann, 'but it helps if he is.' George Mikes humorous israel funny Long before the word Zionism was uttered for the first time, old religious Jews came from all over the world to die in Jerusalem. It is the finest place to die in - it has always been acknowledged. It has a joie de mourir quite its own. George Mikes humorous religious funny The Americans are extremely gadget minded people and American gadgets have a peculiar characteristic: they work. George Mikes humorous funny america The British are proud of their ability to create a muddle and then muddle through all difficulties. I must shake the British pride: muddle is not an exclusively British institution. Read descriptions, for instance, of the over-organized, wonderfully systematic and "thorough" German war machine during the last war. George Mikes humorous war funny Bad English was the second language of Israel and bad Hebrew, of course, remained the national language. George Mikes humorous israel funny The Art of Conversation could not die in Australia; it never lived. Television did not kill it; there was nothing there to kill. George Mikes humor funny art There are many non-intellectual countries; Australia is one of the few anti-intellectual ones. George Mikes humor funny country American radio is the reverse of the Shakespearean stage. In Shakespeare's time the world's greatest dramas were acted with the most primitive technical arrangements; on the American air the world's most primitive writing is performed under perfect technical conditions. George Mikes humorous drama funny They (Americans) have their national game, baseball - which is cricket played with a strong American accent - and they have a national language, entirely their own, unlike any other language spoken on the earth. George Mikes strong baseball funny It is great fun dying in the United States of America. It is great fun first of all for the undertakers who make a wonderful living out of it but also for the deceased who suddenly becomes the centre of attention and fuss. George Mikes humorous funny america Foreigners have souls; the English haven't. George Mikes foreigners soul havens
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