The patient says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!" Henny Youngman More Quotes by Henny Youngman More Quotes From Henny Youngman She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate. Henny Youngman humor funny two Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television? Henny Youngman watches funny television When it comes to work, there are many who will stop at nothing. Henny Youngman I was playing golf. I swung, missed the ball, and got a big chunk of dirt. I swung again, missed the ball, and got another big chunk of dirt. Just then, 2 ants climbed on the ball saying, "Let's get up here before we get killed!" Henny Youngman humor golf funny A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?" "No" says the cop. "What about all these other cars?" "They didn't ask!" Henny Youngman humor men funny When you battle with your conscience and lose, you win. Henny Youngman winning inspirational funny Another drunk goes up to a parking meter, puts in a quarter, the dial goes to 60. The drunk says, "Huh. I lost 100 pounds!" Henny Youngman parking-meters humor funny My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but can she climb a tree. Henny Youngman humor food funny A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well. Henny Youngman get-well humor funny We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. Henny Youngman marriage life funny A Polish man had a bandage on each ear. What happened? "I was ironing, and the phone rang!" "What about the other ear?" "Had to call the doctor!" Henny Youngman humor men funny I was just in London - there is a 6 hour time difference. I'm still confused. When I go to dinner, I feel sexy. When I go to bed, I feel hungry. Henny Youngman confused sexy funny All my wife does is shop - once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under. Henny Youngman sick humor funny I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, "Which way do I go?" But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race... Henny Youngman horse humor funny During the war an Italian girl saved my life. She hid me in her basement in Cleveland. Henny Youngman girl war funny I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. Henny Youngman nice law mother In high school football, the coach kept me on the bench all year. On the last game of the season, the crowd was yelling, We want Youngman! We want Youngman! The coach says, Youngman - go see what they want! Henny Youngman football years school My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. Henny Youngman family time funny I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can't wait to exchange. Henny Youngman christmas waiting wonderful Was that suit made to order? Where were you at the time? Henny Youngman humor funny order
![](https://service.weibo.com/share/share.php?url=https://whatsmyquote.com/quote/the-patient-says-doctor-it-hurts-when-i-do-this-then-don-t-do-that/page/4&appkey=&title=Henny Youngman quote: The patient says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!"&pic=https://whatsmyquote.com/images/quote-4a6c7d2d28318d41b1791588af02b2bd.jpg&ralateUid=&language=zh_cn){kind=link}
![](https://pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=https://whatsmyquote.com/quote/the-patient-says-doctor-it-hurts-when-i-do-this-then-don-t-do-that/page/4&description=The patient says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!"&media=https://whatsmyquote.com/images/quote-4a6c7d2d28318d41b1791588af02b2bd.jpg){kind=link}
