the ultimate in longevity is the Christmas fruitcake. It is a cake made during the holidays with fruits that make it heavier than the stove it is cooked in. Erma Bombeck More Quotes by Erma Bombeck More Quotes From Erma Bombeck Cats invented self-esteem. Erma Bombeck cat self-esteem self He who laughs.....lasts. Erma Bombeck happiness inspirational funny It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else. Erma Bombeck courage dream kindness There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, 'Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams.' Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they're still there. These are great dreams, but they never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line, to hold them up and say, 'How good or how bad am I?' That's where courage comes in. Erma Bombeck acting dream people I remember thinking how often we look, but never see ... we listen, but never hear ... we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive. Erma Bombeck laughter voice thinking The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one. Erma Bombeck funny-life hilarious food It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have...One pair that see through closed doors. Another in the back of her head...and, of course, the ones in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and reflect 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word. Erma Bombeck mom mother children All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. Erma Bombeck funny-inspirational parenting children My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you? Erma Bombeck block fire funny I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night. Erma Bombeck one-day night thinking There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child. Erma Bombeck christmas spiritual morning Friends are "annuals" that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a "perennial" that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There's a place in the garden for both of them. Erma Bombeck funny-friendship garden years It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: THIS WILL VARY WITH YOUR MICROWAVE. Loosely translated, this means, You're on your own, Bernice. Erma Bombeck boxes food mean Children make your life important. Erma Bombeck important literature children I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. Erma Bombeck buzzards car inspiration Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden. Erma Bombeck women seems Time. It hangs heavy for the bored, eludes the busy, flies by the for young, and runs out for the aged. Erma Bombeck elude bored running Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy. Erma Bombeck design fashion literature Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, its unplanned, it's full of suprises. Erma Bombeck surprise spontaneity wonderful If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. Erma Bombeck football soccer sports
