War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands. H. L. Mencken More Quotes by H. L. Mencken More Quotes From H. L. Mencken All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it. H. L. Mencken differences men funny Civilization, in fact, grows more maudlin and hysterical; especially under democracy it tends to degenerate into a mere combat of crazes; the whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by an endless series of hobgoblins, most of them imaginary. Wars are no longer waged by the will of superior men, capable of judging dispassionately and intelligently the causes behind them and the effects flowing out of them. The are now begun by first throwing a mob into a panic; they are ended only when it has spent its ferine fury. H. L. Mencken men war civilization The only kind of freedom that the mob can imagine is freedom to annoy and oppress its betters, and that is precisely the kind that we mainly have. H. L. Mencken equality annoying kind Kant was probably the worst writer ever heard of on earth before Karl Marx. Some of his ideas were really quite simple, but he always managed to make them seem unintelligible. I hope he is in Hell. H. L. Mencken simple earth ideas The best teacher is not the one who knows most but the one who is most capable of reducing knowledge to that simple compound of the obvious and wonderful. H. L. Mencken teaching education teacher Moral certainty is always a sign of cultural inferiority. The more uncivilized the man, the surer he is that he knows precisely what is right and what is wrong. H. L. Mencken inferiority moral men Well, I tell you, if I have been wrong in my agnosticism, when I die I'll walk up to God in a manly way and say, Sir, I made an honest mistake. H. L. Mencken honesty atheist mistake The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself. H. L. Mencken social-taboos men thinking The public, with its mob yearning to be instructed, edified and pulled by the nose, demands certainties; it must be told definitely and a bit raucously that this is true and that is false. But there are no certainties. H. L. Mencken demand society noses The whole drift of our law is toward the absolute prohibition of all ideas that diverge in the slightest form from the accepted platitudes, and behind that drift of law there is a far more potent force of growing custom, and under that custom there is a natural philosophy which erects conformity into the noblest of virtues and the free functioning of personality into a capital crime against society. H. L. Mencken freedom philosophy ideas A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to Heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there. H. L. Mencken humor funny heaven Every step in human progress, from the first feeble stirrings in the abyss of time, has been opposed by the great majority of men. Every valuable thing that has been added to the store of man's possessions has been derided by them when it was new, and destroyed by them when they had the power. They have fought every new truth ever heard of, and they have killed every truth-seeker who got into their hands. H. L. Mencken progress men hands Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies. H. L. Mencken communism made religion A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers. H. L. Mencken law justice funny The world always makes the assumption that the exposure of an error is identical with the discovery of truth - that error and truth are simply opposite. They are nothing of the sort. What the world turns to, when it has been cured of one error, is usually simply another error, and maybe one worse than the first one. H. L. Mencken errors truth discovery I have long been convinced that the idea of liberty is abhorrent to most human beings. What they want is security, not freedom. Thus it seldom causes any public indignation when an enterprising tyrant claps down on one of his enemies. To most men it seems a natural proceeding. H. L. Mencken tyrants men ideas Women in general seem to me to be appreciably more intelligent than men. A great many of them suffer in silence from the imbecilities of their husbands. H. L. Mencken husband intelligent men The great masses of men, though theoretically free, are seen to submit supinely to oppression and exploitation of a hundred abhorrent sorts. Have they no means of resistance? Obviously they have. The worst tyrant, even under democratic plutocracy, has but one throat to slit. The moment the majority decided to overthrow him he would be overthrown. But the majority lacks the resolution; it cannot imagine taking the risks. H. L. Mencken tyrants men mean Politics, as hopeful men practise it in the world, consists mainly of the delusion that a change in form is a change in substance. H. L. Mencken hopeful substance men You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth. H. L. Mencken ocean sea life