Quotes by Dad If you're a guy over 30 by yourself in the hotel pool, you automatically look like a murderer who's just relaxing after he strangled a family. "Yeah-that dad was a tough one to kill." Jim Gaffigan dadguyfunny You know, I'm a total perfectionist, and I labor over trying to get things right. Whether we're putting together an opening for the Masters broadcast or when I was writing with my friend Eli Stillman a book about my dad called 'Always By My Side,' I'm always trying to find a way to do something better. Jim Nantz dadwritingbook All I want to do is be a good dad, but I'm pretty bad at it. Jim Gaffigan good-daddadwant Twitter allowed me to talk about parenting in short snippets and find out what I really wanted to say about it, which is that I'm a dad who had no idea what he's doing. Jim Gaffigan dadwantedideas My dad told me when I went into high school, 'It's not what you do when you walk in the door that matters. It's what you do when you walk out.' That's when you've made a lasting impression. Jim Thome daddoorsschool Dad always said that he had enough trouble sorting the fiction out of so-called facts, without reading fiction. He always said that science was already too muddled without trying to make it jibe with religion. He said those things, but he also said that science itself could be a religion, that a broad mind was always in danger of becoming narrow. Jim Thompson dadreadingmind ...Being a father is the most exciting, amazing thing that ever happened to me. Jimmy Fallon dadexcitingfather I didn't think it was going to be this fun. But everything just gets heightened when you have a baby. The volume gets turned up on life. I never knew I could be this happy, and that's the truth. Jimmy Fallon dadfunbaby My dad's dying wish was to have his family around him. I can't help thinking he would have been better off with more oxygen. Jimmy Carr dadhumorfunny If you love your dad, it’s tough when he dies. If you don’t like your dad, it’s tough when he dies. Because you lose that guy. Whatever you didn’t get, you miss. And what you did get, you miss. Jimmy Iovine dadguylove-you And if I may, call your mom, everybody. I've told this [to], like, a billion people, or so. Call your mom, call your dad. If you're lucky enough to have a parent or two alive on this planet, call 'em. Don't text. Don't email. Call them on the phone. Tell 'em you love 'em, and thank them, and listen to them for as long as they want to talk to you. Thank you. Thank you, Mom and Dad. J.K. Simmons dadmomtwo My mum told me the best time to ask my dad for anything was during sex. Not the best advice I'd ever been given. I burst in through the bedroom door saying "Can I have a new bike?". He was very upset. His secretary was surprisingly nice about it. I got the bike. Jimmy Carr dadfunnysex No, like I said, my dad was never really part of the tennis. His involvement around what I did with the tennis and with my mom and my grandparents was really not a part of my life. Jimmy Connors grandparentdadmom It was okay for Wayne Gretzky's dad, for instance, to give him a hockey stick, or Joe Montana's dad to give him a football, or Larry Bird's dad to give him a basketball, but it wasn't okay for Gloria Connors to give her son a tennis racquet. Jimmy Connors dadbasketballfootball My dad's a very sensitive man, but as the archetypal rebellious teenager, I didn't realise that. Jo Brand teenagerdadmen I think there's nothing better than laughing in life, so that's nice, to be thought of as someone who can make someone laugh. It's 'cause I think life is hard. You know, my dad was a really silly man. A great Irish silly man. And that's fine. Joan Cusack dadnicesilly My mum is bright, ambitious, well read, political and very bolshie: when my dad was conscripted into the Army and posted to Libya, she convinced some general to let her go with him. I don't know how she managed it. Jo Brand dadarmypolitical We all take Mother's Day seriously and then it's like a month later, a bunch of kids get together and say, "I guess we should do this for the old man, too." Father Day's is weird. It's like celebrating Darth Vader's birthday. It's odd I think. Even the gifts we give dads. Like neckties, which are just like a silk noose. Or books. Would you ever want someone from another generation to give you a book? Jim Gaffigan dadfatherbook If God gave Dad Alzheimer’s, He’s got to understand when Dad forgets what church he belongs to. Joanne Fluke alzheimersdadchurch My father was a physicist and also an activist. My first public protest was with my dad at Stanford. I came by all that honestly. Joan Baez dadfatherfirsts«7576777879808182838485»
