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Quotes by Funny Simpsons

Guilt, remorse. It's what separates us from the animals. by Arthur Mitchell

Guilt, remorse. It's what separates us from the animals.

Arthur Mitchell
funny-simpsons guilt animal
Operator! Give me the number for 911! by Dan Castellaneta

Operator! Give me the number for 911!

Dan Castellaneta
funny-simpsons numbers giving
Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prej... by Dan Castellaneta

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

Dan Castellaneta
funny-simpsons race easy
I've always wondered if there was a God. And now I know there is... by Homer

I've always wondered if there was a God. And now I know there is -- and it's me.

Homer
great-simpsons funniest-simpsons funny-simpsons
Pffft, English. Who needs that? I'm never going to England. by Homer

Pffft, English. Who needs that? I'm never going to England.

Homer
funny-simpsons england needs
The strong must protect the sweet. by Homer

The strong must protect the sweet.

Homer
funny-simpsons strong sweet
Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow by Homer

Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow

Homer
funny-simpsons wake-up tomorrow
But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman! by Homer

But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman!

Homer
funniest-simpsons funny-simpsons drink
I was working on a flat tax proposal and accidentally proved ther... by Homer

I was working on a flat tax proposal and accidentally proved there was no God.

Homer
flat-tax funny-simpsons proposal
Art is what separates us from the animals. by Iimani David

Art is what separates us from the animals.

Iimani David
funny-simpsons animal art
If it doesn't have siamese twins in a jar, it is not a fair. by Homer

If it doesn't have siamese twins in a jar, it is not a fair.

Homer
funny-simpsons twins jars
Good things don't end in -eum; they end in -mania or -teria. by Homer

Good things don't end in -eum; they end in -mania or -teria.

Homer
funny-simpsons good-things ends
Homer no function beer well without. by Matt Groening

Homer no function beer well without.

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons ale beer

Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons important animal
Donuts. Is there anything they can't do? by Matt Groening

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons inspiration food
I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was... by Matt Groening

I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons clubs sandwiches
But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just... by Matt Groening

But Marge, what if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons what-if week
Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix. by Matt Groening

Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

Matt Groening
comic-book-guy funny-simpsons loneliness
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please sa... by Matt Groening

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman. Homer Simpson

Matt Groening
funny-simpsons praying men
It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you place the blame. by Oscar Wilde

It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you place the blame.

Oscar Wilde
funny-simpsons blame winning
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