A man says to his mate: "My wife is a twin." His mate says, "How do you tell them apart?" The man says: "Her brother has a beard." Frank Carson More Quotes by Frank Carson More Quotes From Frank Carson Someone threw a petrol bomb at Alex Higgins once and he drank it! Frank Carson alex drank bombs Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish. Frank Carson racist jokes America has only 100 Senators for 309 million people, but Stormont has 108 members for 1.7 million. Frank Carson members america people People in Northern Ireland vote for their church, they don't vote with their heads; it is ridiculous. Frank Carson ridiculous church people My idea for peace in the Middle East is to go back to the 1966 line, but to build even more houses for the Palestinians, who are a poor people. Frank Carson house people ideas It's never occurred to me to worry about my health, or that I'll get old, or that people will stop laughing at me. Frank Carson worry laughing people I'm not really a homosexual. I just help them out when they're busy. Frank Carson homosexual busy helping There was an Irish space program to go to the sun. They went at night so they didn't get burnt. Frank Carson humor night funny A man walks into a hospital feeling unwell and the doctor says: "Sorry, you've only got three minutes to live." The man said: "Can you do something for me?" "Yes," he said. "I'll boil you an egg." Frank Carson humor sorry funny My uncle Jimmy took liver salts twice a day for 40 years. He died on Sunday, was buried Wednesday and the following Friday they had to go to the cemetery to beat his liver to death with a stick. Frank Carson uncles friday funny An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman looks at them and says: "Is this some kind of a joke?" Frank Carson bars humor funny Men only go for skinny women because they're too weak to argue - and salads are cheap. Frank Carson humor men funny I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle." Frank Carson swimming humor funny My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon. Frank Carson war funny father My Irish mate told me, if you file down the edges of a 50 pence piece, you can use it as a 10p. Frank Carson humor use funny I've been married to my wife for 60 years but it feels just like yesterday, and you know what a bloody awful day yesterday was. Frank Carson feels-just yesterday years The thirties were troublesome in Belfast, and then of course there was no work for people, and it was terribly religiously divided. Frank Carson then divided work people
