Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means. Henny Youngman More Quotes by Henny Youngman More Quotes From Henny Youngman The more I think of you, the less I think of you. Henny Youngman humor funny thinking Those two are a fastidious couple. She's fast and he's hideous. Henny Youngman couple humor funny I think the world of you...and you know what condition the world is in today. Henny Youngman inspirational world thinking How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.' Henny Youngman pages guy crazy My wife has a black belt in shopping. Henny Youngman shopping humor funny Payday at my house is like the Academy Awards. My wife says: May I have the envelope please. Henny Youngman awards wife funny The hitter asks the owner to give him a big raise so he can go somewhere he's never been, and the owner says "You mean third base?" Henny Youngman sports giving mean I told my mother-in-law my house is your house. So she sold it. Henny Youngman law mother house My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. Henny Youngman wife cooking dresses I went out with a girl last night. She wasn't a Lana Turner. She was more of a stomach turner. Henny Youngman lasts girl night The Doctor says, "You'll live to be 60!" "I AM 60!" "See, what did I tell you?" Henny Youngman doctors humor funny My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash. Henny Youngman family brother funny What is a home without children? Quiet. Henny Youngman silly baby children A Polish man bought a zebra for a pet. What does he call the zebra? Spot! Henny Youngman zebras humor funny A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, "Doc, how do I stand?" The doctor says, "That's what puzzles me!" Henny Youngman humor men funny Are you married? What do you do for agravation? Henny Youngman married My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked. Henny Youngman humor funny rooms I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife. Henny Youngman wife lasts luck I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me. Henny Youngman anniversary love funny I went to the bank and reviewed my savings, I found out I have all the money I'll ever need. If I die tomorrow. Henny Youngman saving tomorrow needs
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