I don't want to be a director. I want to direct. There's a difference. Marty Feldman More Quotes by Marty Feldman More Quotes From Marty Feldman I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I'd gladly eat a network executive or a politician. Marty Feldman food life funny You offer a sincere compliment on a great mustache and suddenly she's not your friend. Marty Feldman mustache sincere compliment Money can't buy poverty. Marty Feldman poverty money funny Hookers have to deliver on their promise... unlike politicians. Marty Feldman politician promise Too old to die young, and too young to grow up. Marty Feldman growing-up grows young Could be worse... Could be raining Marty Feldman rain Sex is two plus two making five, rather than four. Sex is the X ingredient that you can't define, and it's that X ingredient between two people that make both a man and a woman good in bed. It's all relative. There are no rules. Marty Feldman men two sex I don't enjoy anything while I'm doing it. I enjoy having done things, though. Marty Feldman enjoy done Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act. Marty Feldman comedy humor funny I don't know any jokes, which is embarrassing. I wish I did. Marty Feldman embarrassing jokes wish He made us laugh, he took my pain away. I love you, Lauretta. Marty Feldman laughter pain love The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with. Marty Feldman sword than write pen I am too old to die young, and too young to grow up. Marty Feldman old grow i-am die The pen is mightier than the sword, and is considerably easier to write with. Marty Feldman sword than write pen