Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date? Peter Kay More Quotes by Peter Kay More Quotes From Peter Kay You never know where to look when eating a banana. Peter Kay bananascleverlooks There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when your hand or head is stuck in something. Peter Kay stuckpanichands Garlic bread - it's the future, I've tasted it. Peter Kay garlicbread You ever dip your biscuit in your tea and it breaks. I swear now, you never get used to that. Peter Kay dipbiscuitstea One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger. Peter Kay awkwardtoiletsstranger I'm not homophobic. I'm not scared of my house. Peter Kay homophobicscaredhouse Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones. Peter Kay sandwichessquaresfood Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat? Peter Kay settingstoastershorrible Is French kissing in France just called kissing? Peter Kay french-kissfrancekissing I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. Peter Kay animalideasthinking If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth? Peter Kay pieceslandearth The most painful household accident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug. Peter Kay plugssockpainful The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity. Peter Kay monkeysopportunitylooks I might be collecting wheely bins in 12 months time but at least they'll be wheely bins outside back gates that I know, in a part of the country that I love. There's no place like home! Peter Kay homemightcountry Amarillio, just turn to the left and 500 yards down Peter Kay yardsturnsfake-people Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose. Peter Kay unclesfamilynoses No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers. Peter Kay coat-hangersmetalscoats Old women with mobile phones look wrong. Peter Kay old-womanphoneslooks It's impossible to look cool whilst picking up a Frisbee. Peter Kay styleimpossiblelooks Some days you see lots of people on crutches. Peter Kay disabilitycrutchespeople
