You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car. Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes From Jeff Foxworthy I actually had a chance to be in Delta Farce, but I couldn't do it because I read the script. Jeff Foxworthy farce scripts chance You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup. Jeff Foxworthy redneck dining bottles You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds. Jeff Foxworthy redneck three might You might be a redneck if...you've been on TV more than times describing the sound of a tornado. Jeff Foxworthy redneck sound might You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors. Jeff Foxworthy redneck blue thinking You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work. Jeff Foxworthy vcr redneck wrestling You might be a redneck if...the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection. Jeff Foxworthy redneck loss earthquakes [about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day. Jeff Foxworthy humor funny sex Little girls love dolls. They just don't love dolls clothes Jeff Foxworthy parenting clothes girl I'll just have itchy, watery eyes! Jeff Foxworthy itchy eye The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him. Jeff Foxworthy roosters quality voice I notice my wife when she's on the phone with her friends, man they will share every animate details of their lives with each other. See men once we become friends with another man we may never say another word to him, unless there's valuable information that needs to be exchanged. Things like "Hey Jim, your shirt's on fire." Jeff Foxworthy humor friendship funny If someone at Fleet Farm offers you assistance and they don't work there you might live in Wisconsin. Jeff Foxworthy wisconsin offers might Country music is about new love and it's about old love. It's about gettin' drunk and gettin' sober. It's about leavin' and it's about comin' home. It's real music sung by real people for real people, the people that make up the backbone of this country. You can call us rednecks if you want. We're not offended, 'cause we know what we're all about. We get up and go to work, we get up and go to church, and we get up and go to war when necessary. Jeff Foxworthy real war country You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house home There's a whole segment of the population with a mentality that bases good times on where they can go and what they can buy. Jeff Foxworthy bases population good-times The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more. Jeff Foxworthy humor funny years Talking with Gary Busey is kinda like sex. You want to do it, you just don't want to be alone when you do it. Jeff Foxworthy want talking sex If you have more fish on your wall than pictures, you might be a redneck. Jeff Foxworthy redneck wall might I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it, it takes another two or three hours a day. I don't want to give two or three more hours away. Jeff Foxworthy doe giving two