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Quotes by Ass

Have I played the part well? Then applaud as I exit. by Augustus

Have I played the part well? Then applaud as I exit.

Augustus
ass bad-ass exit
Love is nothing but a pain in the ass by Ava Gardner

Love is nothing but a pain in the ass

Ava Gardner
ass pain love-is
I couldn't hit an elephant's ass with a bull fiddle. by Babe Didrikson Zaharias

I couldn't hit an elephant's ass with a bull fiddle.

Babe Didrikson Zaharias
ass bulls elephants
You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground, you know that? by Barry Webster

You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground, you know that?

Barry Webster
ass holes knows
The Devil is an Ass , I do acknowledge it. by Ben Jonson

The Devil is an Ass , I do acknowledge it.

Ben Jonson
ass devil acknowledge

Mr Speaker, I withdraw my statement that half the cabinet are asses - half the cabinet are not asses.

Benjamin Disraeli
ass cabinets half

Don't be a jerk to other comics and don't let the business beat you down, stay positive and if you work your ass off you're going to get somewhere.

Bill Burr
ass stay-positive jerk
You can't tell somebody to kiss your ass on a scooter! by Bill Engvall

You can't tell somebody to kiss your ass on a scooter!

Bill Engvall
scooters ass kissing
Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd comin... by Bill Hicks

Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.

Bill Hicks
ass miracle eating
Ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you by Bill Maher

Ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you

Bill Maher
ass doctors asks

Mitt Romney we think is going run again. He says he has no plans to run, but he said if he did run, this time things would turn out differently. Yes they would. This time he would get his ass kicked by a woman.

Bill Maher
ass running thinking
We have to let nature put what's left together, and see what it c... by Bill Mollison

We have to let nature put what's left together, and see what it can come up with to save our ass.

Bill Mollison
ass come-up together

If Britney Spears would paint her ass green, I'm sure you would spot green asses all over L.A., as soon as the word was out.

Billie Joe Armstrong
ass green paint
I figured I would have to tell someone to kiss my ass before it w... by Billy Bob Thornton

I figured I would have to tell someone to kiss my ass before it was all over, and I have -- twice.

Billy Bob Thornton
kiss-my-ass ass kissing

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's on the outside of your ass?

Billy Connolly
asteroids ass hemisphere
Put your trust in the Lord....your ass belongs to me. Welcome to... by Bob Gunton

Put your trust in the Lord....your ass belongs to me. Welcome to Shawshank.

Bob Gunton
ass redemption welcome
Furiously and gorgeously write your ass off. by Bob Hicok

Furiously and gorgeously write your ass off.

Bob Hicok
ass writing
Words matter. Especially if you're kicking someone's ass in words... by Bob Saget

Words matter. Especially if you're kicking someone's ass in words with friends.

Bob Saget
kicking ass matter

I don't know anything about you, so when you randomly come up and grab my ass, this isn't a friend doing it. It's like, "Who the f### is doing...? I was not expecting that."

Brad Williams
expecting ass come-up

I collaborate a little bit with different aspects of my own mind. I kick my own ass instead of kicking other people's asses.

Bradford Cox
ass different mind
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