Everyone smiles in the same language. George Carlin More Quotes by George Carlin More Quotes From George Carlin It seems to me like a perversion of talent for an artist of any kind to further the corporate structure of America or the personal interests of the morons and thieves who run it. George Carlin artist running america I think of myself as an entertainer: I'm a performing entertainer, I'm a stand-up comic. But there's an artist at work here, too. One who interprets his world through his own filter. George Carlin filters artist thinking If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed. George Carlin best-god diseased atheism The base of evil in the world is religion of any kind George Carlin kind evil world As you swim the river of live, do the breast stroke. It helps to clear the turds from your path. George Carlin humorous swim rivers People say life begins at conception, I say life began about a billion years ago and it's a continuous process. George Carlin process people years Children are not our future, and I can prove it with my usual, flawless logic. Children can't be our future, because by the time the future arrives, they won't be children anymore, so blow me! George Carlin usual blow children Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey. George Carlin humor stupid funny I feel sorry for confetti. Its useful life lasts about two seconds. And it can never be used again. George Carlin comedian sorry two Heroin, forget it. In my neighborhood, I could see what heroin did firsthand and I was definitely afraid of that number. George Carlin heroin numbers forget Humor is based on surprise, and surprise is a milder way of saying shock. It's surprise that makes the joke. George Carlin shock surprise way I believe myself to be a worthwhile and inventive performer in my own right. But I'm not in a league with Lenny [Bruce], certainly not in terms of social commentary. George Carlin social league believe In adolescence you have to separate yourself and establish your identity. So, being very independent anyway, I took charge. George Carlin adolescence independent identity The straightest line between a straight distance is two points. George Carlin distance lines two All messages from Satan are played forward and are in standard American English. George Carlin standards satan messages We use up words like 'spiritual' so fast in this culture. Twenty years ago spiritual had a distinct meaning. But now there's a lot of jack-off thinkers who just love to talk about the spiritual. And there is a lot of bogus - is bogosity a word? It should be - a lot of bogosity in these spiritual seekers. So you have to find another way to express it. I just call it 'how I fit'. George Carlin atheism spiritual years Personally, emotionally, I'd rather divorce myself from the world than face the heartbreak of partial success. Because partial success implies overwhelming failure. George Carlin divorce heart world Language is the most elementary aspect to our humanness, probably. In addition to that, it's the embodiment, it's the apotheosis of the human experience, it's the way we summarize ourselves. George Carlin apotheosis embodiment way Don't confuse my point of view with cynicism. The real cynics are the ones who tell you that everything's gonna be all right. George Carlin cynicism real views We created god in our own image and likeness! George Carlin positive-atheism