Quotes by Funny The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective. Al Neuharth climbing attitude funny I don't think the discus will ever attract any interest until they let us start throwing them at one another. Al Oerter inspirational sports funny Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows. Al Unser boyfriend family funny So that's why one of my rules of parody writing is that it's gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit. Al Yankovic merit writing funny People never ask people doing serious music, 'Do you ever think about doing funny music?' Al Yankovic funny people thinking It isn't necessary to be rich and famous to be happy. It's only necessary to be rich. Alan Alda money happiness funny Few women care to be laughed at and men not at all, except for large sums of money. Alan Ayckbourn laughter money funny What is a husband? He is the one who, with a touch, can bring back the starlight and glow of years long ago. At least he hopes he can - don't disappoint him. Alan Beck long-ago husband funny Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall. Alan Bennett wall inspirational funny Had your forefathers, Wigglesworth, been as stupid as you are, the human race would never have succeeded in procreating itself. Alan Bennett race stupid funny I had to have a brace because I had big teeth. If I'd gone to Africa I would have got poached. Alan Carr teeth gone funny When I was a kid I used to hate getting picked for team sports. It would be the fit and sporty guys over there. And me and the fat kids over here. Those kids were fat! One girl had to be cut out a hula hoop. Alan Carr girl sports funny What am I supposed to do if I go bald? Get a wig? Fat, goofy, gay, wig. I might as well get a piano and start an Elton John tribute act! Alan Carr piano gay funny Since both its national products, snow and chocolate, melt, the cuckoo clock was invented solely in order to give tourists something solid to remember it by. Alan Coren humor funny order The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it. Alan Coren humor funny fall Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. Alan Dundes christmas inspirational funny If a student takes the whole series of my folklore courses including the graduate seminars, he or she should learn something about fieldwork, something about bibliography, something about how to carry out library research, and something about how to publish that research. Alan Dundes graduation inspirational funny Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens? Alan King marriage witty funny You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet. Alan King marriage witty funny Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious. Alan Minter stupid sports funny «23456789101112»
