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Quotes by Jokes

I did a show called 'What A Country,' with Yakov Smirnoff and Don Knotts. I used to write jokes for Yakov's stand-up act.

Mike Scully
act write jokes country

Something about not waiting for the laugh of a laugh track allows you to take lines that otherwise might be seen as just direct jokes, and make them seem realistic.

Mitchell Hurwitz
laugh you jokes waiting
When I write 'Beetle Bailey,' I can always do jokes about him bei... by Mort Walker

When I write 'Beetle Bailey,' I can always do jokes about him being lazy, and everyone gets it.

Mort Walker
always lazy jokes i-can

When I first met Salman Butt, he was a senior player, and he was a star for Pakistan, and I was a junior, but he had a very good image amongst the juniors. It wasn't that he was only nice to me: he was close to all the juniors, cracking jokes and socialising with them and being pleasant to them.

Mohammad Amir
good me jokes nice

I have a file of four million jokes... I have them cross-indexed. Whatever subject you want, I have a joke on it.

Milton Berle
joke you jokes want
Writing and telling jokes is my favorite thing to do, and I want... by Michelle Wolf

Writing and telling jokes is my favorite thing to do, and I want to be able to do that forever.

Michelle Wolf
jokes want forever writing

I definitely script things out. I definitely write things down and try to write jokes. Often, they're terrible. I often write terrible, terrible jokes.

Michael Ian Black
down try things jokes
Dwarves are still the butt of jokes. It's one of the last bastion... by Peter Dinklage

Dwarves are still the butt of jokes. It's one of the last bastions of acceptable prejudice.

Peter Dinklage
butt last jokes prejudice
I'm not too keen on jokes that are one-liners. I want the situati... by Philippe Falardeau

I'm not too keen on jokes that are one-liners. I want the situation to be funny.

Philippe Falardeau
jokes situation want funny

Our family dinner table was my first platform - every dinner was all about sharing stories and jokes and points of view.

Phoebe Waller-Bridge
view dinner jokes family

I adore jokes. They're a theatrical contrivance, but the irony of all fiction is that you approach reality by avoiding it a bit; you spoof it a bit.

Paul Morrissey
you irony jokes reality
I love making jokes on the Internet. by Jack Schlossberg

I love making jokes on the Internet.

Jack Schlossberg
making jokes internet love

Baltimore has been a punchline/punching bag for years - I've landed a few blows, to be fair - but those old jokes are out of touch.

Laura Lippman
bag old touch jokes

If we were making a cop comedy about bad cops or cops who were comically bad at the jobs, then the jokes would be more hijinks and more like slapstick.

Daniel J. Goor
bad like jokes comedy

I spent the first 22 years of my life absorbing everything, like a big disgusting cell, and now I'm disgorging it with jokes added out into the world. That's a really gross metaphor.

Daniel Mallory Ortberg
my-life jokes life world

Anything where I get to write a lot of jokes and have a lot of creative control - that's all I want.

Daniel Mallory Ortberg
control jokes creative want

We have come to expect campaigns to be mean and stupid and politicians to be unresponsive, self-seeking and for sale to the highest bidder. We make jokes about our vice president, and all we ask of a president is that he be likeable. We seem to have given up on the Pentagon's corrupt use of our tax dollars.

Donella Meadows
politicians expect jokes stupid

My favorite moments are the moments everyone cries over. I see people in the audience crying, and I go, 'I did that, too. I don't just do the jokes. I also do the cries.' Jokes and cries, jokes and cries. That's all I'm here for, people.

Douglas Carter Beane
see jokes moments people

One of the jokes on our flight is that, if we have a normal entry day going, the plan is for me... to actually take the orbiter first and fly it for maybe 10 or 15 seconds and then hand it on over to Scooter.

Duane G. Carey
fly day me jokes

As a comedian, frankly, I don't care that much about bad jokes.

Dave Rubin
dont-care bad jokes care
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